ridiculous shopping trip report

[rm]

For all my genderqueer and costuming stuff, you'd think I'd be comfortable shopping anywhere I damn please. But I'm not. In fact, the thought of going into the mens or boys department at any store absolutely paralyzes me to the point of not even wanting to pursue whatever thing I'm pursuing when the need arises.

I'm not sure why. Afraid at being caught at soething maybe -- although whether I'm afraid at being caught at being female or being weird or just randomly incompetent of some ettiquette I am not aware of, I am not sure.

I always try to make up cover stories in my head. So I have something to say if someone challenges me, which has never happened of course. I'm just some chick shopping for her man or her son or whatever. I'm old enough to have a son. I kept telling myself that today in Macy's while looking at boys dress shirts in medium blue. Size 20 fits. Thank god for small favours. That said, if I want for cufflinks, I'm going to have to have some shirts made, which I keep meaning to do anyway. So yeah.

So between that and a stop at that weird discount store that sells the Sarah Jessica Parker line (side note, they had this HIDEOUS pair of blue pinstripe pants that was so perfect I could die, but not in my size. Tragedy or great blessing to all who know me? Also, why is seer sucker drawing me like a magnet lately -- also not in my size), and the braces that came in the other day, I have a totally fabulous outfit for tomorrow, except that I need to sew buttons into teh pants for the braces and I really need to find a pair of shoes that's remotely reasonable. The tragic demise of my oxblood wingtips is REALLY fucking tragic right now.

Gah. The whole experience was dreadful. But I'm mighty pleased with myself. And I could totally get away with wearing the whole shebang to the office, except I'd spend all day cracking myself up and I'm too busy for that shit. I cannot believe I found pants that fit me that actually sit on my waist and as long as I stand properly don't make me look all hip-y.

Comments

[askeladden.livejournal.com]

Shopping for formal wear in the little boys' section is loads of fun. If you listen carefully, you can hear generations of tortured screaming suspended timelessly in the air above the garment racks. Highly recommended.

(See icon. 2002, Dillard's Missoula, size 16 Husky.)

[angstzeit.livejournal.com]

I imagine the men in the girls clothing section get more scrutiny. But fear brooks no reason.

It is also good to hear a New Yorker hates Macy's. They've certainly pissed off a good deal of Chicagoans (Macy's that is).

Nagging question: Do you pronounce your first name with two or three syllables?

[stardragonca.livejournal.com]

You came, you saw, you shopped.

I'm sure that if you actually had some nefarious task to perform, you would calmly and efficiently carry it out.

[mme-furiosa.livejournal.com]

re: seersucker

Because it is awesome, and made for summer. I just wore seersucker slacks today.

[nex0s.livejournal.com]

Also, why is seer sucker drawing me like a magnet lately -- also not in my size

I've been crazy for seer sucker lately. Dunno why. I saw a ladies seer sucker suit by a designer that I adore and keep itching to go back and get it. Grah!

N.

[n-decisive.livejournal.com]

There's no protocol, and a whole lot of women who don't do costume or genderqueer shop for themselves in the men's section. The only rule of etiquette for it that I've ever been made aware of was obvious to me: don't try things on in the men's dressing room.

In the end, though, and I know you know this, no one is thinking anything when you're shopping in the men's section. Those who wonder are likely to give you a story on their own.

Seriously, though, in many regions and circles such as the farming stores and Western riding groups, all shopping is done from one bin, so to speak.

[awe-struck.livejournal.com]

I used to buy mens jeans all the time--easier to shop for and fit better. Not any longer since I have taken on a more womanly shape--as in rubenesque shape. So, go for it without fear

[bladderwrack.livejournal.com]

I hate shopping for clothes. The simplest of things appear not to exist when one is looking for them. That said, the men's underwear department at Marks and Spencer's has always been lovely, though I still feel awkward in most places looking for men's suit jackets (they never fit) and, conversely, women's underwear (where I do get the occasional odd look or at least imagine I do, but pish to them). Honestly, most people are busy politely ignoring everyone else. Getting stuff that fits is still an absolute bastard though.

[rm.livejournal.com]

3. Ra-shell-lean.

Macy's is the absolute devil. I had to go back today and I just wanted to run away shrieking.

I always try to make up cover stories in my head.

[stardragonca.livejournal.com]

I know it's going to be really difficult to do, but try to imagine saying "Hello, I going to be dressing up as a man later this week, and I need to find men's cloths that will fit me, can you help me?" It's the only way to handle it. No, need to act furtive, since you're Up To Quite Good, not Up To No Good.
New York is, after all, the City of Brotherly Indifference.
Easy to advise, hard to do, I know. But still.

[fitfool.livejournal.com]

I wander through the men's clothing section all the time and no one seems to look twice about it. I think people would just assume you're picking clothes out for someone else.