blargh

[rm]

I'm hoping at least some of my fellow creatives will understand what I mean when I just make an irritated noise at today.

I'm pretty used to the idea of sometimes walking around with grief that isn't mine because of writing or acting work I'm doing. And I feel EXACTLY the same way today, except it's because of a dream I can't fucking remember, which I suppose might sound mystical and romantic, but it's more akin to when you really need to sneeze and can't.

Blech!

Comments

[fleur.livejournal.com]

That is the *perfect* description of me trying to remember a dream on occasion. Yes. Thank you.

[theotoky.livejournal.com]

totally get it. absolutely.

[tdanaher.livejournal.com]

I've come to live with a theory picked up in the ancient past that dreams are a way of having your brain exercise its emotional muscles. Like, if you have a dream where you end up laughing, it's because your brain is pushing at the part of your electrochemical tissue that controls laughter. Many times I've found that I will feel sorrow or anger or worry coming out of a dream, and I've also found that I haven't had reason to feel those emotions in my waking "real" life, so my brain pushed them on me to make sure I knew how they still felt if I needed to. Does this make sense?

When I exercise, if I work a muscle I haven't worked in a while, it aches long after the exercise stops. Maybe your mind is working the personal-not-acting-not-fiction-grief muscle because it needs to make sure the ability is still there?

[gement.livejournal.com]

My partner asked me several times a day for *months* what was wrong, no matter how often or patiently I explained that everything was fine. Finally, out of sheer irritation, I noticed the pattern and explained it to him. What he was reading as "worried, sad, and possibly angry" was my "shutting out meatspace to work on character drama, where emotions are inevitably running high."

Now he just says, "Fanficking?" And I say, "Yeah."

And that deep-down itchy ache when the thought has slipped away but the emotional tension remains... yeah, I hear you.

[rm.livejournal.com]

Yeah. I was going to say (before the little adventure with my veiling just detailed) that I know "who" it is, but not why. The adrenaline rush of the flooding drama kicked it into marginally more clarity, which is lovely, but there's nothing I can do for it.

[feyandstrange.livejournal.com]

Or the itchy thing that can't actually be scratched. Oh, man, yes, I hate that feeling. SOMETHING IS STUCK IN MY BRAIN and I can't get it out and picking at it just scabs over and ARGH.

I had "something about trees, argh" for half of last week.

[cara-chapel.livejournal.com]

Hi, I read you a lot on friendsfriends, though you don't know me. :-)

I know exactly what you mean. I have been part of some online role playing games and I was very startled the first time I started crying out of the blue, when I felt perfectly fine, and I realized it was my character who wanted to weep, not me.

Empathy is a rare and wonderful gift. :-)