sundries

[rm]

Tonight we do the paperwork for Claudette and we pick her up Monday.

Meanwhile, tomorrow we head to Cold Spring.

Google Buzz - less confusing than Wave but just as dumb? Certainly the various drama that's sure to arise when people start realizing who people know (either through the "how dare you talk to my ex" phenom or the "OMGOMGOMG you know Random Famous Person") because people couldn't figure out how to be discrete is going to be epic. Google, of course, auto adds contacts in a way that makes avoiding drama harder.

Nelson Mandela was released from prison 20 years ago today.

When he came to New York, after, there was a ticker tape parade for him. I had just met a young man through our mutual recent appointments to the March of Dimes Birth Defects Foundation National Youth Committee whose father was a judge, and he invited me down to one of the court house buildings where he said he could get us out on the roof. He did, and we were the only people up there and we watched the parade from there. It was terrifying, and I remember thinking he was supposed to kiss me; he didn't.

Tigers are on the verge of extinction in the wild.

What's on a $177 bagel?

What would you do with 178 sq. ft.?

Alexander McQueen has taken his own life.

Charlie Wilson has died.

A queer zombie anthology from a small horror press got canceled apparently because some of the other authors who write for that press expressed their homophobic complaints about sharing a publisher with queer content. When you surrender to bigots, even if you are not a bigot, you are still doing something bigoted. This goes for the press in this little drama and it goes for everyone who automatically gives a higher rather to fanfiction with gay content in it because otherwise someone on the Internet might yell at them.

Capitulation to bigotry causes real harm.

phaetonschariot explains why: Queer people people don't get to stop being queer. How fucking handy it is that you can duck out of the fight. Just because you can, doesn't mean it's right. You know, I don't like people yelling at me either.

jslorentz talks about desire, activism, quaint little categories and trying to do the right thing -- for oneself and for the community.

Designing a better gender menu, via supergee. I don't agree with all of the suggestions (I don't, for example, like "it's complicated" as the only choice beyond "male" or "female" and I'm not all that off-put by "other" because I feel it includes less judgment than other options which assign narrative that may not be relevant to me. Obviously YMMV), but it's a good, interesting, relevant read.

Is it terrible that my main reaction to this seems to be about my hatred of the double-breasted suit jacket?

Last night we watched that Buffy episode where everyone keeps reenacting that final fight between the teacher/student murder/suicide couple in 1955. It was like "here, watch the cast of Buffy demonstrate Practical Aesthetics." Seriously, it was WEIRD. I have no idea if any of the actors or the director were drawing on that technique for the episode, but every time the scene played out, it felt EXACTLY like a a Practical Aesthetics scene to me. EVERY TIME.

Also, wow, I feel way too much compassion for Spike.

Comments

[ciel-vert.livejournal.com]

I think the trouble with Buzz is less about people not knowing how to be discrete, but more about Google suddenly opting EVERYONE with a Gmail account IN without telling you (exactly). People shouldn't have to work to keep their email contacts private, that should be the default.

[brewsternorth.livejournal.com]

...Yeah, the fact that the Gmail addresses on your email list just get sucked up into a Twitteresque follow/followed list automagically without your (or their!) say-so is decidedly creepy.

And wordy mcword to the phaetonschariot post (I read it when rm posted it on Twitter last night).

[ciel-vert.livejournal.com]

Yeah, creepy is definitely a good word for it. And I thought hitting "no thanks" on that "try Buzz" screen actually meant "no thanks". But nope. Found out later you actually have to scroll down to the bottom of your inbox page and click "turn off buzz" before it will actually go away for you. That's just... not right. I should always be able to opt-IN to a service that's going to end up sharing my personal info with the world.

And yes, I definitely agree with your wordy mcword re: that post.

[nonlinearmusing.livejournal.com]

178 square foot apartment?! I would have to go outside to change my mind! Although, he makes it work without looking like a jumble of junk piled floor to ceiling. Still, I would go insane quite quickly!

[eumelia.livejournal.com]

Jesus, all the posts you linked to really hit the spot.
It must be one of those days.

[gement.livejournal.com]

I have seen a proposal I found valuable, which was checkboxes instead of radio buttons (so you can check more than one) of
Man
Woman
Other
It's Complicated

Allowing me, for example, to hit "Woman" and "It's complicated" and not feel like I got stuffed into too tight a box. I'm always torn when I see Man/Woman/other, because I do primarily identify as a woman. I just want my complications to be recognized at the same time.

[rm.livejournal.com]

Yeah, especially on the Internet, I feel like, it's really important to be like "women are here" in areas that are considered more male (or, for that matter, just not overtly female), but at the same time... the whole thing is a big PitA.

[delchi.livejournal.com]

Huzzah on Claudette! Will there be homecoming pics? " OopsaCat! "

[delchi.livejournal.com]

I just want my complications to be recognized at the same time.

I read that as " I just want my complications to be organized at the same time. " and I thought it would make an amazing quote to hang in my office. :)

I'm not part of the debate, but has anyone thrown up the argument about selling demographic information and how having things like ' other ' or 'it's complicated' might hinder the process? It's not a strong argument at all, but I'm curious if anyone has brought it up. I don't think the mainstream has an advertising vertical for ' other ' yet.

[rm.livejournal.com]

That's a huge part of the issue. Most sites only want the info for demographic reasons to sell to advertisers, but earning the good will of the probably fewer than 5% of users who would choose non-binary options, has other business benefits.

[aviv-b.livejournal.com]

I'm really concerned about Google Buzz - I too thought I was opting out of it by saying 'no thanks.' Bad enough that Picassa grabs all your pictures off your hard drive (and essentially keeps them forever even if you delete the account), Google is getting way too intrusive. I have a gmail account that I don't use - time to dump that.

I looked at Designing a Better Gender Menu - and if gender being asked for marketing purposes then interests would better serve. Because if you went by my 'female' gender and age, you'd be marketing face lifts to me. Not cameras,or any type of new technology used for hiking/camping.

For discussion purposes, I like the slider bar. Speaking for myself (and I'm pretty sure I'm not alone), where do you 'fit' when none of the categories fit you? It allows for us who fall in-between the gay/bi/straight categories someway to identify. Probably explains why Ianto with his 'its only Jack' perspective resonates so strongly for me.

[tsarina.livejournal.com]

I confess I like "it's complicated" because it is for me.

Someone, it must have been vanity fair or bazaar, ran a long article with photos in the wake of Isabella Blow's death that I wish I still had. The first articles I saw about McQueen didn't say anything about suicide, but they were wire service articles.

[delchi.livejournal.com]

I can see that. My theory is that the big game players are not aware of the fewer than 5% that you speak of as being a benefit.

Of course the idea of creating a new social space that is designed for that 5% comes to mind, but angel investors are not growing from trees anymore.

[rm.livejournal.com]

What they are, I hope, increasingly aware of is that the Internet enables small groups of angry people to fuck up company's images REALLY fast. And the Internet is marginalized-friendly. Which means, don't piss off the queers, pretty much.

[rm.livejournal.com]

Maybe not immediately, but yes.

[gement.livejournal.com]

They do have a demographic for "likes to think of themselves as individuals," though, and "liberal/progressive" (a presumption, but no worse than "girls like lipstick" by advertising standards), and "gay appeal".

I'd say that 5% is self-selecting for some very targeted advertising, and advertisers pay better for really specific targets.

[gement.livejournal.com]

Aha! You've gotten to the haunting!

In which I feel awful for Giles, and for Spike, and in which I was totally blindsided by the final possession twist. Consider my expectations subverted. (I was younger and hadn't played around with gender as much at the time that I first watched it, but given the nature of television scripts, I think I'd have been impressed even today.)

The last Don't Walk Away From Me, Bitch almost brought me to tears. It was like a really good fanvid character analysis, except canon.

[rm.livejournal.com]

My heart is breaking for Giles. Just _breaking_. I continue to find this cathartic in a post-CoE world.

[tdanaher.livejournal.com]

The bed in that 178 square foot apartment is AWESOME. I used to live in a place a little bit smaller than that when I first moved to the East Village, and having a bed which lifts up with a hinge at the headboard end to reveal massive storage underneath would have solved many problems.

[delchi.livejournal.com]

That might be a reason they are using to stay away from the demographic. Do you think that maybe posing as an angry mob poised to fuck up a company at the first slight would turn business away? Even if it's not completely true - projecting that image in a risk adverse economy might backfire. Likewise a slight could be unintentional or ignorant instead of malicious or hate based, and yet get the same Maxwell's silver hammer response.

I love and respect my queer friends and family-of-choice, but sometimes I am afraid of them. I'm more understanding because I know where the anger comes from , and how hard it is to exist out of the box ( geek, obese, queer supporting, pro choice, book reading not book burning ), but the fear is there.

[rm.livejournal.com]

You know, being nice, simpering weak (WOMANLY) homosexuals hasn't been working for us. Letting people know that we're not that isn't likely to make things worse. Also, I have no patience for people's tone arguments. I am not treated like a human being by my government or by many, many companies that would have me by their products. I'm not interested in, nor obligated to, pet them and tell them not to be scared. Some queer activists have the patience for that, and that's useful, but it's neither a requirement nor something I'm interested in doing.

[abnormal-apathy.livejournal.com]

I had that stupid Gmail Buzz drama within 5 minutes of realizing they'd rolled it out. Stupid exes!

[delchi.livejournal.com]

Specific targets with money to spend, which I do believe is the perception ( if not a stereotype ) of the gay community at large.

I wish we had more individual thinking people , regardless of demographic. It might make this whole adjustment process easier. like watching CNN the other night and have the Army captain talking about how 60 years ago the thought of someone like himself ( Asian-American ) serving in the army was 'unheard of' and 'would never happen' , and yet here he is today - the concept of him being not allowed to serve is foreign and strange. His hope was that 60 years from now the same can be said for the DADT fiasco - that we will look into the past and say ' wow, they used to not let people in the army because of being gay? I'm glad we grew past that'.

I have a long deep seeded hate for the media machine, but it is what drives this culture, and it's probably the best target to effect large scale change.

[rm.livejournal.com]

See, I don't have a hatred for the media machine, which makes these conversations evil. I am the media machine. It's my living, it's my father's living. It's just a thing. It can be smarter. It can adapt. What doesn't adapt dies. You don't want to know how many television exec I know who no longer own a TV because they can jsut watch everything online.

[xtricks.livejournal.com]

The whole gender menu thing is particularly interesting to me due to some workplace issues (I am my office's rep to the diversity committee at my workplace) going on now.

My sorta-partner ran the trans-information center for one of the homless youth social service agencies here and they needed to develop some surveys to try and get some numbers behind who needs what kinds of services. He finds 'other' objectionable, though I see it as sort of a first step.

What they came up with was:

*male
*female
*other (+ comment box)

And a check box for 'trans' because trans status can be in any gender combination. It seemed to be the best combination of quantatatively useful and broad enough to start expanding options for gender variant people.