sundries

[rm]

On the train this morning a small child was singing: "Spider filled with rabies. Rabies rabies rabies. Spider filled with rabies. Rabies rabies rabies!" It made my morning.

Speaking of bugs, it's an exciting week in Rach and Patty land as we're going to see Ovo on Thursday.

shes_unreal needs some help getting a better job to get out of a bad situation. It's complicated, so I'll let her explain. Reliable source, real person, real situation. Please help if you can.

A fandom auction is being run to help thdancingferret who's job was evil and found a way to fire her for having cancer. Because the need is immediate, bidding closes tomorrow. Go now.

Yesterday on Twitter I linked to this giant sinkhole story before they included any info about the sinkhole, just the picture with no explanation whatsoever. Patty and I had a good time reading the comments (and subsequent ones on Twitter) to each other. They involved a remarkable number of references to "orbital lasers." But that sinkhole? Serious business.

Americans at the Bolshoi. One of the things that interests me is a passing mention that it is "all but taboo" for dance teachers to touch their students in California. I recall having a similar frustration in fencing -- take my limbs and show them where to go! That's how dance was when I was studying, but that was the 70s and 80s, and I guess the world changed; I am glad it hasn't everywhere.

Turns out there's more girls than boys in NYC's gifted programs and, as usual, The New York Times is alarmed. Meanwhile, people shrug and say "well, that's a shame" about all the ways boys of favored over girls. You'd think it would be okay for girls to be better than boys once in a while.

Lovely gay-themed ad for McDonalds from France. Although, when I first saw it, I thought McDonalds was going to be the host of this kid's coming out conversation with his father. But that's not the plot, which makes it all a little bit realer.

A history of trans and trans-like veterans that I should actually get around to checking out, since I reference stuff like this in that Snape, Gender and Heroism project I should actually write up for publication somewhere.

Last night on Buffy and Angel:

So, it was finally time for "Seeing Red," and my feelings are largely ambivalent. I don't think what Spike did (whether it was rape, attempted rape, threatened rape, etc.) was out of character -- we see him physically and sexually bully women both pre- and post- chip. I did find Buffy's response out of character -- not that she was startled, afraid and weak/injured, but just that what the show has argued as her automatic (not learned, most of us forget what we've learned when we're in danger) fighting abilities were not there. Also, I hated how the scene was overlit, although it was also interesting at the end how the scene where Buffy is talking to Xander before Warren shows up with a gun is also overlit. Also this whole thing doesn't stop me from being engaged with Spike as a character -- that's the great thing about fiction, I can like totally shit people who do totally shit things because their use in a narrative is brain stimulating on some level.

I found Tara's death to be startling, even though I knew about it (I didn't know it was this episode), and well done. I did not find it to be homophobic. Willow and Tara were the last couple standing, and if Whedon wanted all the couples doomed and they'd just gotten back together, that's what he had to do. I also appreciated that prior to the shooting Willow and Tara finally read like people who actually fuck, as opposed to the way lesbians usually read on TV, which is as people who pet each other gently and don't really have sex.

Xander was SUCH AN ASSHOLE in this ep I thought I was going to throw something at the TV.

Loved the Spike/Anya thing.

Meanwhile on Angel, Cordy is some mother goddess demon of love who I assume will eventually sacrifice her life so that Angel can become mortal. Connor is fucked up (and where do I know that kid from) and Holtz has bad make-up and a fucked up plan. Lila is courting Wesley and none of this is going to end well.

Comments

[ladyaelfwynn.livejournal.com]

Xander started irritating me back in "The Pack" way back in season 1. The crap he gets away with astounds me. He regularly ties with Angel for being my least favorite character, primarily for how they both try to control the lives of the women around them.

[crewgrrl.livejournal.com]

This goes in with a curse card my friends and I wrote for a home-grown version of Munchkin. The curse card reads as follows:

Curse!

Jossed.

You just died. For. No. Good. Reason.

[rusty_halo.livejournal.com]

*nods* I have the exact same problem with Xander and Angel and their controlling behavior towards women. I still haven't forgiven Xander for the lie in "Becoming 2." >:(

[eandh99.livejournal.com]

I think RTD knew Ianto's death would cause a huge reaction - but in that portion of the fanbase which he has consistently dismissed, the online fans and in particular the female online fans. Did he mean to be "even more shocking" than Joss? Maybe. He certainly seems to thrive on the reaction.

[rusty_halo.livejournal.com]

I agree, but the problem is that attempting to understand Spike's actions in the context of the previous Buffy/Spike relationship dynamic comes close to blaming a woman for her (near) rape, which is horrible. I blame the writers for creating this mess in the first place. There is no real-life equivalent to the situation, and the metaphor is so mixed--one episode Buffy is domestically abusing Spike, then the metaphor is that they're "in the closet" and Tara's encouraging them to come out, then it's that Spike is the abusive (near) rapist. The writing that season was so inconsistent--the various writers all clearly had different ideas about what was going on with Spike and Buffy, and the resulting mess ended up hurting a lot of people who identified with Spike and who identified with Buffy.

[ladyaelfwynn.livejournal.com]

Argh! That lie irritates me to no end! And the lie that he didn't remember anything whilst possessed by the hyena that he's caught on in "Phases" (maybe, can't remember the ep. exactly, but he does this weird little role play about "snarling and prowling" and knowing the wolves because he'd been a hyena).

The writers let them laugh that off with maybe a raised eyebrow but Xander doesn't suffer any consequences for his actions.

Re: Touching when Teaching

[browneyedgirl65.livejournal.com]

This is interesting. I'm in martial arts, long enough to the point where I teach people from time to time now. And yes, sometimes you just have to grab something and move it the right way to try and get it to click. Interestingly, as a woman, I find most of the time I don't have too many issues with this (or it being done to me), except when I'm dealing with adolescents (say about 12-17 years old or so) because I remember being so self conscious at that age, and also awkward because of all the growth and consequent balance changes.

OTOH, Aikido already involves tons of body contact, grappling, etc, so that probably makes it a bit easier. Fencing is so formal and people are separated by weapons, I can see it being a much bigger deal.

Still, it's something I think about now and then...

[browneyedgirl65.livejournal.com]

Same here! I wonder how deep it is, too. The picture makes it look like it goes on forever, much deeper than what I'd think a sewer system might do.

OTOH, sinkholes are just an awesome geological construct. I saw plenty in Florida -- has to do with the type of ground and the way water can wear parts of it away that are softer -- but this is far away the most amazing.

Re: Touching when Teaching

[j-v-lynch.livejournal.com]

Interestingly I also study aikido. When I get moved there, it's usually as a result of the sensei showing me the move from the uke's perspective. :)

Re: Touching when Teaching

[j-v-lynch.livejournal.com]

Interesting. I don't think I've ever had a student's reaction be embarrassment. Tentative and scared of hurting me, yes, but never embarrassed. The embarrassment usually comes when they accidentally cup shot someone.

[angstzeit.livejournal.com]

I read it is as deep as the Statue of Liberty is tall.

[snakeling]

I saw the McDonald's ad at the cinema today, and it's quite cute. They actually showed two others, one with a mother lecturing her kid for forgetting her schoolbag at school, and then the kid lecturing the mother for forgetting her wallet at home, and the other featuring two old people chatting on a dating service and lying outrageously (she says she's a model and he says he's a surfer, etc.), then when the battery runs out they each go to the counter and meet (and still lie about themselves, but less outrageously XD)

They're all available on the French McDonald's website. Uncheck the box at the bottom left corner until only "films tv" is checked.

[ladyaelfwynn.livejournal.com]

This is one of those seasons I'm really glad to have not been in the fandom then because it was so messy. I hate the scene in the bathroom because, knowing a good portion of the back story, including both characters ancient history, you really can see the steps that lead to the behaviour and it does make Buffy look partially culpable, which is way icky, especially to me, as a loud and proud, in one's face feminist.

As much as I love Firefly, season six Buffy and Season 3 Angel suffered from Joss being distracted by a shiny new space western with spookers and sp-belly dancers (from Alan Tudik's commentary on one of the Firefly eps. ;-p), especially the end of Buffy season 6. Joss and his stable of writers were paying way more attention to the new show and letting Buffy and Angel just sort of coast.

[heavenscalyx.livejournal.com]

The other thing that came up a lot was the trope of the "crazy, evil, or dead lesbian," in particular that the pattern in popular media of making a lesbian character lose her mind or get killed as soon as it's become clear she's actually having sex with her lover. It's not a pattern I'd recognized before or even heard of, but that was the theme of a lot of the enraged meta.

The only time I've seen the crazy/evil/dead lesbian schtick done more concisely than in "Seeing Red" (1 dead lesbian, 1 evil/crazy lesbian) was "Divided Loyalties" in Season 2 of Babylon 5 (where Talia Winters becomes dead, evil, and crazy all in one fell swoop).

[citrinesunset.livejournal.com]

that's the great thing about fiction, I can like totally shit people who do totally shit things because their use in a narrative is brain stimulating on some level.

That's how I see it, too.

I don't think it excuses Spike's actions to say that the entire relationship between him and Buffy was very messed up, and Buffy was a big part of the problem there, too. The thing that bugged me a bit about the bathroom scene is that I felt it was portrayed as the breaking point where everything went to hell between them, but things had never been healthy.

[pantryslut.livejournal.com]

I am still angry at the way the attempted rape scene was presented -- the lighting, the camera angles, Buffy's inability to fight back, all of it. Again, as I have believed all through season six, Spike is entirely in character, but Buffy isn't at all. And to top that off with what reads to me as POV Rape-o-Vision...oh, it makes me shudder. It feels completely exploitative and gross and I am very cross with some writers and producers, I am.

Also, boy do I agree about Xander.

[sevendayloan.livejournal.com]

Lilah/Wesley is probably my favourite AtS couple

Oh, amen. So incredibly fucked up, and yet so completely awesome. What a pair of hatesexy BAMFs.

[sevendayloan.livejournal.com]

Spike/Anya really brings out the douchiness in Xander, doesn't it? I mean, I love the character, I really do, but holy inappropriate reaction, batman! I was seriously ready to punch him in some of those scenes. I generally forgive him pretty easily for the left-my-favorite-character-at-the-altar thing, but seriously. Such an asshole.

I was also startled by Tara's death, even warned about it ages and ages in advance. I also never found it to be homophobic, despite some of the tropes in play here. I may be the only person who feels this way, but it all seemed very real and true to character.

As for Angel ... yeahh, good things don't happen too much on this show, do they? We did get Wes/Lilah out of it, though, which I love with all my shriveled little heart. Which probably says something about me

[karenmiller.livejournal.com]

Bloody oath! I swear, I thought I was the only person on the planet who saw this! Thank you everyone, for showing me I'm wrong. I bitterly bitterly hate this scene and its implications. So she can beat the crap out of him, she can say no and mean yes, over and over and over again, and that's okay. And he's supposed to be a mindreader now and know that this time no means no? Bullshit. For me it kind of ties in with the Spike/Willow scene where he goes to bite/drink her and can't perform because of the chip, and it ends up being played for laughs. Now I do laugh at that scene, but at the same time ...

Anyhow. Yay for not being the only one who sees that bathroom scene as profoundly disturbing, and the whole Buffy sainthood thing off, and yes, Xander being repulsive. But then I mostly found him repulsve from go to whoah.

[1-mad-squirrel.livejournal.com]

The French Micky D's ad "I'm lovin' it!" Heh! Thanks for posting.

[dr-is-in.livejournal.com]

I feel for thdancingferret. My mom was forced by her employer to retire early while recovering from breast cancer.

[sevendayloan.livejournal.com]

Well damn, pass along the recs. ;)

[chaos-by-design.livejournal.com]

Mad Men is realistic? Wow. I mean, I thought it might be, but since I wasn't even born yet during that era I had no way of knowing for sure. *shudders*

Re: Touching when Teaching

[anotheranon.livejournal.com]

Neither of my coaches have ever tried to move me into place manually - they've handled my sword, but not my body. And I like it that way as I distinctly dislike being touched without permission - after all, corps a corps is a yellow card, right?

Having said this I think I could get over it if I was asked and if my coach asked first. I can't imagine he'd be weird about it, as he's so "all business" all the time.

[chaos-by-design.livejournal.com]

I had a really hard time with Seeing Red because rape is one of my no-go zones; I can't like a person or even see someone as a person if they've raped or attempted to rape someone. For me it's worse than murder.

And I really loved Spike as a character, so that was a problem. I finally got around it in my own way, but it always left me with a really yucky feeling. But what especially bothered me was Buffy's reaction, or rather lack of reaction. She never seems angry enough about what happened to satisfy me.

I would like to point out that I don't consider Buffy's treatment of Spike a-okay in that relationship either, but for me the attempted rape just overshadowed everything emotionally. Also, while a lot of people have pointed out that Buffy's behavior sucked, I always saw Spike as a bit pathetic for not just hauling ass out of there. I realize that's hard to do, but it's not impossible, and if you're stuck in a situation like he was in, well worth doing.

Connor became one of my favorite characters on Angel, but that's because he hit a lot of my character kinks: deprived childhood, brainwashed warrior, psycho woobie, etc.