sundries

[rm]

It wouldn't be Christmas without a hiccup or two, but we wound up having a lovely night, eating dinner at an outdoor restaurant on a pier, exchanging goodies and running randomly into Kat. Yay.

Tonight we're going to some mass yoga event thing in the park.

I posted some links late last night, so if you're interested in linky goodness check back there as well as below.

Jeez, Bristol is in two weeks. That's kinda bizarre and intense.

Yay, the price on the hotel I wanted went back down. I am booking it now.

Just booked my rail tickets.

Meanwhile, yay, Fabulous Welshcakes is happy to mail me stuff in the UK, which means I just have to figure out which hotel is going to be the least stupid about this and call Cardiff some time next week to arrange. I do not lie when I say that 50% of my drama about Cardiff on this trip has involved food issues (this, and wanting to go to the St. Katherine's Dock Market on July 9).

Patty does this hilarious/awesome thing when I go "I can't think of an idea for this Torchwood fic I need to write" where she says "How about a story where Jack and Ianto..." and the conclusion of the sentence always involves a reference to something she and I have done recently, usually highlighting some personal absurdity from which she has rescued me. And let's remember, she's not even in this fandom.

Okay, okay, I'm really behind on DW, S5, but why did no one tell me to hurry up and fucking watch because of a possible reference to Jack?!!?!?!?!? I need to catch up!

Valiant or stupid? Explaining why it's not okay to call Gwen a whore on Gallifrey Base. I am sick of this dance we do where we love men for their flaws and vilify women for theirs. Gwen's a whore; Jack's just like that. Ianto is romantic, tragic and lonely; Tosh is pathetic and desperate. THIS IS CRAP, PEOPLE. CRAP CRAP CRAP. Apparently, I'm not the only one fighting this sort of bullshit today.

This Sunday is Pride (if you have recently been invited to a picnic by me, you should also be invited to our gathering for this, poke me if you haven't), and we'll be there. Saturday though, we're thinking of going to the beach, which means we'll be too fried when we get back to hit the women's dance this year.

Last night I had to ask "why is the cat green?" I still don't know the answer, but Cricket, having white fur, had a big stripe of green on the bottom of one leg.

I really need to email Duchess today, and yet feel too tired and impaired to do so.

I am way too into the sales on Gilt lately. Sometimes I buy stuff. Sometimes I'm like "shit, that's ugly/appropriative/bizarre."

Kimlee is a real person I know. She's a professional performer, and like many such people, doesn't have health insurance. Recently, her husband, whose insurance had recently ended, took a bad fall, suffered a brain injury and required surgery. You can imagine what this did to their finances. For those in NYC there's going to be a benefit for her, and for those not in NYC, roadnotes, who is also a real person that I know, is collecting donations that she will bring to said event.

Questions you never knew we'd be asking: Are $6,000 robotic baby seals ethical?

Why I hated private school. Also, why I am the way I am: Social climbing on the Great Lawn.

Op-Ed in support of making oral contraceptives OTC medications.

Update on gay teens in Mississippi.

General McChrystal recalled to DC after making remarks in an interview critical of the Obama administration. Dear Obama: one more place to stop playing nice. Fuck consensus.

Comments

[brewsternorth.livejournal.com]

So "Fabulous Welshcakes" is actually what they call themselves? That's awesome. Also, that they deliver.

I hadn't thought it was feasible to make oral contraceptives OTC, but the op-ed certainly makes a persuasive argument.

Enjoy the weekend!

[rm.livejournal.com]

Yes! That store is really calld "Fabulous Welshcakes" which is the most hilarious part of everything. THe font on the sign is such that it doesn't pop at all, so when Patty and I were standing there and she exclaimed "Fabulous Welshcakes!" I was like, "WTF is with you?" but so it is.

[roadnotes.livejournal.com]

For me, the hard part about Kimlee's situation is that her husband's going through some of the same things Soren did. Traumatic brain injuries are always different, because brains are different, but from all reports, he's had the not recognizing her, the shortness of temper, the being lost in time... she's going through hell right now.

[rm.livejournal.com]

I was wondering how similar the stuff was when I saw your PM this morning. It's such a miserable thing.

[dremiel.livejournal.com]

I think I'm a bit in love with your Patty.

[sykii.livejournal.com]

Yay and Hi.
And Cricket was green because it was Christmas-- she donned her gay apparel, etc.

[brewsternorth.livejournal.com]

I admit, it sounded like a euphemism to me.

Did you hear about the random pianos in NYC parks? (I saw the two in Tribeca Park, or rather, heard them being played first.)

[rm.livejournal.com]

Not only have I heard of them, we ran into two of them last night (out at the end of the pier where the outdoor restaurant on Riverside and 67th is).

My two cents...

[nekosensei.livejournal.com]

I don't mean to be a killjoy about the whole making oral contraceptives OTC, but I think it's an incredibly bad idea. After all the crap I've been through, I'm starting to think that women do need to see a doctor and get screened for certain conditions such as clotting disorders before going on the pill. And don't get me started on the whole Yaz/Yasmine debacle! I was on that drug when I had my embolism and now I'm finding out that, at the time, they marketed the drug as being less likely to cause blood clots. Now studies are starting to show that women who took Yaz/Yasmine were three times more likely to have a blood clot than those on other oral contraceptives and six times more likely to have a clot than women on no oral contraceptive. I don't consider myself the lawsuit happy type, but \ I'm seriously starting to consider suing the pants off Bayer.

And aside from the risk of blood clots, heart attack, and stroke, a lot of women do have other nasty side effects from taking the pill, and I think they would be better off consulting a doctor and finding out what brands would work better for them.

Re: My two cents...

[redstapler.livejournal.com]

I'm inclined to agree with this, but only because I know my own medical history would essentially require it.

I'm not usually of the "I'm cold, you should put on a sweater" method of legislation, but you're right: Many conditions are seriously under the radar and can only be discovered with a doctor's consult.

That said, I know if I *didn't* have the history I had, I'd be pretty much demanding OTC oral contraception.

[dskasak.livejournal.com]

The only Jack reference I can dig up from Season 5 of DW happened in last Saturday's first half of the season finale, where it's all but confirmed that River is a Time Agent, like Jack, but the scene where this happens is rather short and glossed over with the events at the end of "The Pandorica Opens."

[rm.livejournal.com]

That's the thing. I'm a bit I'll take what I can get on these things. PEOPLE NEED TO TELL ME. DAMMIT.

[tsarina.livejournal.com]

I think Robo seals are great. For people who may not have other resources, may be unable to interact with service pets for whatever reason, they could be a great, great thing.

[dskasak.livejournal.com]

Given how that particular episode ended, which I won't spoil here, it's very easy to see how that detail regarding Jack got lost in the "OMG! Can you believe that?!?!" shuffle. Still, if that really is River's origin, then that would add more complexity to her background, such as whether or not she knows Jack (most likely), or why she was following the Doctor through time (perhaps explained in part two, which I won't see for a couple of weeks due to my DC trip).

[rm.livejournal.com]

I'm a big fan of the robo seals. Mainly for just existing as a thing to talk about. Robo seals!

[elainasaunt.livejournal.com]

I'm not sure (with all due respect) where you're getting that. River buys - or scams - a vortex manipulator that its would-be seller says he ... acquired from a handsome Time Agent. There was nothing that I heard about River herself being one, and I watched the scene a couple of times.

Did you already hear, rm, about the scene in the third episode (set in WWII) in which a dashing pilot - whose features we never see - is flying a Spitfire in space, and if memory serves he is wearing a scarf very like Jack's?

[tsarina.livejournal.com]

I intend to surround myself with cute robo seals and such when I am old.

[laura47.livejournal.com]

Patty does this hilarious/awesome thing when I go "I can't think of an idea for this Torchwood fic I need to write" where she says "How about a story where Jack and Ianto..." and the conclusion of the sentence always involves a reference to something she and I have done recently, usually highlighting some personal absurdity from which she has rescued me. And let's remember, she's not even in this fandom.

you two are so adorable. :-)

[bodlon.livejournal.com]

Last night I had to ask "why is the cat green?" I still don't know the answer, but Cricket, having white fur had a big stripe of green on the bottom of one leg.

Is knowing better or worse, do you think?

OTC oral contraceptives is something I'd absolutely endorse, though the two problems I can think of that go with it would be price points (making it OTC might make it cost more than prescription) and privacy (you'd have to take it to the cashier, not just pick it up at the pharmacy).

Yoga in the Park

[jadegirl.livejournal.com]

Elena Brower is an excellent teacher, I have her audio practice CD. I'd nearly decided to go to that one, but I went to the Times Square event yesterday morning (6AM!). I'm looking forward to hearing about how it was!

[brewsternorth.livejournal.com]

Re: OTC oral contraceptives:

nekosensei makes an important caveat upthread about side-effects.

As to price points, that's partially covered in the article, in that the writer notes that some forms of contraception are already subsidized by governmental assistance, so why not this one?

Privacy is an issue, though.

gwen is not a whore

[alt_universe_me.livejournal.com]

RE: Valiant or stupid? Explaining why it's not okay to call Gwen a whore on Gallifrey Base. I am sick of this dance we do where we love men for their flaws and vilify women for theirs. Gwen's a whore; Jack's just like that. Ianto is romantic, tragic and lonely; Tosh is pathetic and desperate.

Thank you! :) I feel I must comment on this because I have been thinking about things like this a lot lately. Bear in mind I have a background in languages, and I was thinking about this in terms of sexism in language as well as otherwise.
First of all, I was just thinking about the differences between Tosh and Ianto and how both are relatively quiet and private people but are seen and described in completely different ways. Tosh is shy. Why? Why can't she just be a private person who doesn't feel the need to speak everything that comes to mind? I think Jack even describes her as shy at one point. But really, is she that shy? The online dictionary I just used says that shy means timid or startled. That doesn't sound like the Tosh I know. The Tosh I know is outspoken the very first time we see her. She's sitting around the table, engaging in conversation with everyone, and even telling about Jack's sexcapades. In fact, the only time I think we ever see her being "shy" is around Owen, and aren't people mostly shy or nervous around their crushes? So really, I don't think she's that shy at all. But because she is a smart woman without a man, she must be shy, or otherwise she'd have a man already, right? (sarcasm).
This is where sexism in language comes into play, I think. Words have picked up certain connotations that are applied without thinking based on the gender of the person we are applying them to. Sorry if that last sentence didn't make sense, but I'm trying to say that the only reason Tosh is called shy is she can't get the courage to ask Owen out (which she actually does later because she's honestly not that shy). The only reason we use that word with her is because she is a woman, and the word itself is seen as a word mainly used for women. In fact, I would go so far to say that they only time I hear the word applied to a male is when the male is in someway seen as feminized. "Manly" men are never seen as shy, even if they are. Of course Ianto isn't considered shy, but is he? Another definition for shy is "Drawing back from contact or familiarity with others; retiring or reserved." At least in season one, I think that this describes Ianto better than it does Tosh. Yes, I would say that the only reason we don't call Ianto shy is because he is a man. Now, I wouldn't call either Ianto or Tosh pathetic, and I might say that both of them are lonely at times, but of the two of them, I would say that Ianto is the shy one. For example, Tosh has no problems talking in front of others, while Ianto tends to keep to himself more. Tosh seems to have more difficulties talking with Owen one on one, while Ianto seems to open up more when he is alone with Jack. So, I would argue that the application of the word "shy" is based not on actual characteristics of people, but prejudices and generalizations based on gender.

Re: gwen is not a whore

[alt_universe_me.livejournal.com]

Man, that got long, and I didn't even talk about Gwen yet. Suffice it to say, I don't think that Gwen is a whore. I don't even think that Jack is a whore. I don't necessarily like them as a pairing, but I like Gwen as a character. Sometimes I wonder what it would be like if Gwen and Ianto's characters were switched, and how I would react to them. But I'll stop here, I think. Once again, thank you for bringing this up :)

[rm.livejournal.com]

We're really sickening.

[laughingacademy.livejournal.com]

Gilt.com is part of my daily routine and I've bought some gorgeous things at good prices, but every so often I'll click on an item just so I can point it out to a co-worker and say, "See this right here? This is why the rest of the world hates us." (My favorite remains the full/queen-sized cashmere blanket with a giant spider woven into the center.)

[rm.livejournal.com]

I am being a little too enraptured with the diamond rings there right now. It's like girl programming.

Re: My two cents...

[moizissimo.livejournal.com]

I've been denied a prescription renewal until I at least made an appointment for my annual pap smear, which in some ways is really flipping annoying, but also good. During a pap smear here (Vancouver, Canada!), you also get screened for STIs, and depending on where you get it done you can get free vaccinations (if you are one for vaccinations). All of this is medically important, and so many avoid it.

Cost is another issue for sure. Most extended health plans are chosen because they offer coverage for oral contraceptives - especially plans for universities and colleges. I can't imagine what the students would do if they suddenly had to pay the >$30/month some of the pills cost. Ack!

[laura47.livejournal.com]

:-D

[penguineggs.livejournal.com]

That might be because Jack takes his look from Spitfire pilots, not vice versa. The white silk scarf to prevent chafing is what they actually wore.

[bodlon.livejournal.com]

Yeah, and that's a thing for sure. That said, the pills the author is talking about (progestin-only) are less risky when used as directed than even some other oral contraceptives (inc. Yaz).

The other rub being that if the system worked in a way that women had adequate access to reproductive health care (cost, logistical, social), OTC might not look like the better option. It would come part and parcel with recommended screening, and additional care as well (STI screening, vaccination).

It should be considered basic care.

[rm.livejournal.com]

I think it's also worth remembering that not being afraid of doctors is a privilege. It's not that long ago that reproductive-related experimentation was done, without consent, on poor and minority individuals. More people who need birth control might get it if they weren't required to go to a doctors office and get a bunch of not directly related tests first.

[bodlon.livejournal.com]

That's a really, really good point. And one I often forget.

*makes mental notes to remember this more often*

[thepyromanical1.livejournal.com]

Oh, the fact that we're still having Gwen-bashing issues in fandom? Drives me insane.

I mean, it would be cool if everybody could just grow the fuck up and respect women, but I guess that would just be too much to expect of them.

[weirdquark]

a vortex manipulator that its would-be seller says he ... acquired from a handsome Time Agent.

I missed that. Possibly because I was distracted by the would-be seller looking like Male Zhaan from the "John Quixote" episode of Farscape.

[laughingacademy.livejournal.com]

I'm boggled by the notion that there are actually people willing to spend thousands on something the size of a thimble and then trust UPS to delivery it safely.

[malle-babbe.livejournal.com]

That, and *being listened to* by doctors...

[rm.livejournal.com]

I forget anyone has that privilege, considering that when I got sick with what turned out to be celiac disease my doctor wanted to take out my gall bladder to see what would happen instead of actually diagnosing me.

Re: Yoga in the Park

[rm.livejournal.com]

It rained all over us! Cancelled!

[gwyd.livejournal.com]

aliant or stupid? Explaining why it's not okay to call Gwen a whore on Gallifrey Base. I am sick of this dance we do where we love men for their flaws and vilify women for theirs. Gwen's a whore; Jack's just like that. Ianto is romantic, tragic and lonely; Tosh is pathetic and desperate. THIS IS CRAP, PEOPLE. CRAP CRAP CRAP.

There was an explosion on the BPAL board recently on that topic recently too. Much be something in the air.

This sort of thing really pisses me off, the sex negative shaming and the double standard.

[rm.livejournal.com]

Oh I heard about the BPAL thing. That one got a lot of mileage. Wasn't the offender a mod too?

[rm.livejournal.com]

Is it awful that I was sort of relieved that, for a change of pace, it was (I think) a guy?

[thepyromanical1.livejournal.com]

Only in the way that Gwen bashing is expected to come from women. I mean, what that says about the community... :(

Are other fandoms like this about female characters? I mean, I know there's plenty of Rose!hate out there too, I don't consider the fanbases for TW and DW to be separate.

[dr-is-in.livejournal.com]

Or the insurance we had at the time when I was first diagnosed with PCOS who rejected all the doctor wanted to do and wanted me to have a full hysterectomy....that would have fixed nothing. They didn't want to follow the female doctor's recommendations because it "infertility treatments" and none of the male doctors I had seen at the time would support the female doctor.

[tsarina.livejournal.com]

Until you can get a robo seal, have this one!

[gwyd.livejournal.com]

Yep. A very aggressive mod who left the rest of feeling like there wasn't any recourse. She wasn't just defending her right to use "slut" and "whore", she got personally nasty with a number of posters. I kept hoping another mod would notice if enough heat and light was generated, which happened. As of yesterday, the thread was frozen pending judgment. I haven't checked today yet, but given the high quality of modding over there, I'm hoping things will be properly sorted when I log on later.

[rm.livejournal.com]

*nod* I heard from another involved party that the offending mod followed them into email and continued to harass them after the user asked for no further contact. So I'm hoping whatever steps are taken are significant.

[gwyd.livejournal.com]

I hope so too. The whole thing was alarming and so... not BPAL if that makes sense. This is a community that managed to stay civil and sane on both sides in the political threads during the last election after all. There was no movement yesterday. I'll check again tonight.

If it hadn't been a mod, I'm sure things would have been dealt with the night it happened, but the kind of weight the mod was slinging was completely unfair and out of proportion.

I hadn't heard about the following to email. It's horrifying and invasive and utterly inappropriate. Given how the mod in question was acting, I'm not at all surprised.

[gwyd.livejournal.com]

I checked. She's still listed as mod, but most of her posts in that thread are gone along with people quoting them and much of the response. I have no idea what's going on behind the scenes.