sundries

[rm]

Patty is home, and it's been super New York-y already: the other people in Terminal 8 were so excited to see their loved-ones they were blocking folks from getting out; the cab said his credit card thing was broken; the sound of the heating pipes woke us up; and there was some seriously creepy bird action this morning. Thumbs up.

Zuckerberg is Time's person of the year. How pissed do you think Assange is?

Meanwhile, the US Air Force has blocked access to news sites that have published the leaks. can someone explain this to me? Is it anything other than "these secret things aren't secret anymore, but we're going to pretend they are, even if it means you're working from a deficit of what is now common information?"

Someone is stealing New York's junked appliances.

On splitting the check. I understand the complaint. I don't understand why it's necessary. I've almost NEVER run into this, though. We all figure out what we owe, chuck it in, and since I've been over the age of about 25, we've usually had too much money, not too little.

A bill has been introduced in California to add historical contributions of LGBT people to school textbooks. A similar legislation passed four years ago, but was vetoed by the governor.

The academics I know keep posting this, but I still love it every time I see it: The Snake Fight Portion of Your Thesis Defense.

Comments

[missysedai.livejournal.com]

With regard to splitting the check, it seems to me that the article's author could stand to find herself better friends/dining companions.

In my social circle, we have a couple people who don't eat much or don't drink alcohol or are just really watching their pennies. It's never an issue. The check comes, they put in for what they owe (including tax and tip), then the remainder of the check is split evenly between the rest of us, because we tend to order similarly priced entrees and drink about the same amount of wine.

How hard is it to just speak up?

[fleur.livejournal.com]

If I sense an oncoming pissing match, or if I know that the group I'm dining with is prone to it, I'll grab my card and immediately announce "I'm putting in $xx.xx". And then say nothing else.

[fleur.livejournal.com]

I don't understand why there is a stigma to only paying for what you ordered when the bill comes. I genuinely don't.

Splitting the check is I'm sure a hassle for servers, but it seems like they have a better chance of getting a tip that way. Because let's face it, if someone comes up short, it's the tip that it's going to come out of.

[rm.livejournal.com]

I don't get it either.

In New York most restaurants refuse to split checks. You can hand them some cash and say "put the rest on this card" but you can't get separate checks. I always find it sort of shocking when people do it elsewhere, but it seems like it's okay elsewhere.

[brewsternorth.livejournal.com]

How pissed do you think Assange is?

Dunno, but his supporters are livid.

I've not run into problems with check-splitting either. Odd, that.

[dsmoen.livejournal.com]

I think it's too soon for Assange, frankly, but I do think Wikileaks is important.

[ladypeculiar.livejournal.com]

I'm sad to say that the splitting the check thing happens to me much, much more often than I'd like (though much less as my social circles continue to change, I will say). My particular complaint is when people will give in exactly as much as their food costs, with no additional $ for tax and tip. It's ridiculous to me that I should have to tell grown people about tax and tip. 4 realz.

[filkerdave.livejournal.com]

Wow. I mean, tax is usually on the bill and tip's easy enough to calc (here in NY, I usually double the tax and round up to the nearest whole dollar amount, with extra thrown in for good service. It usually comes out to about 20%

[filkerdave.livejournal.com]

I'm used to splitting the check evenly, but I should note that I'm a Road Warrior, so almost all of my dining out in groups is done with people who, like me, can expense their meals. The server brings a bill and we each throw down a card and say, "Please split it n ways."

When I dine out with friends in social situations, we all generally have similar enough meals/prices that the difference between splitting the check evenly as above is usually our preferred option because it's easy and we're lazy

[hab318princess.livejournal.com]

see, that's what comes from skimming - I first misread 'On splitting the check' as something along the lines of 'spitting on cheek' - will now read the article

The Snake Fight - so glad I avoided University :D - but loved the analogy

[jethrien.livejournal.com]

I'm sure he's otherwise a great guy, but is it ok if this story kinda makes me want to kick him? I mean, I also dread the whole accounting thing, but not enough to want someone else to subsidize my food. I guess if you're a wealthy big spender going out with wealthy big spenders, then trying to work out who owes what is rather petty. But it seems like an awfully big assumption that no one at the table has a reason to be watching their expenditures.

[bethynyc.livejournal.com]

I really don't get the splitting the check thing. Our book group meets regularly, and everyone pays for what they got, plus extra for tax and tip. Sometimes someone will order a dessert for everyone to share, or if there is a birthday the person will be paid for, but it generally works out pretty well.

We also go to the same place regularly, and this has led to the owner buying rounds of drinks or desserts for the group!

[blergeatkitty.livejournal.com]

I've been to way too many gatherings where folks order piles and piles of extras and then refuse to pay for any more than whatever the share is when the check is split evenly. I knew one guy in particular who was constantly a special menu snowflake (and not because of anything medical or even being a picky eater, just, like, he'd order a pasta dish when everybody else was splitting pizzas or two appetizers in addition to his entree) and would not only refuse to do anything but split the check, he'd also be the first person to snag extra money back if it turned out we'd all overpaid.

My solution: I got better friends. Friends who don't make me pay $45 for a $12 taco plate.

[adelheid-p.livejournal.com]

I can only recall this happening with a group when we figure that we've all spent about the same amount on dinner and shared a few appetizers and/or desserts. At other times, people pay for what they ordered (including tax and tip) and maybe pitched in a little for appetizers that were shared. Sometimes, we've gone out in honor of some event in someone's life and then split their portion among us a gift to them. But I can't recall there being an occasion when it seemed that some ate/drank much less than others but paid the same amount.

[marcmagus]

The check splitting thing is necessary because some people continue to be selfish enough to screw things up for everybody, either by insisting on an even split in favor of "making things easier" (with no sense of fairness or an assumption that everybody can afford to pay far more than their share to create that, and is willing to, and no realization that it's always the same people paying over), or through a complete failure to account for the cost of the non-entree items they've purchased and/or additional costs such as tax and tip.

IOW, you have friends who are competent at the check splitting thing, but not everybody got over the crap that in your experience was limited to companions of your youth.

[rm.livejournal.com]

Right, no, I get that. What I'm saying is, I don't encounter people who play this "let's all split it equally game" EVER, which is specifically what the article complains about. What I don't understand is the prevalence of that phenomenon, which seems to be wide-spread by strikes me as obviously unfair.

[ckd]

Problems with check-splitting? There's an app for that. I saved enough to pay for it the first time I used it--a 10 person meal at WisCon at a place that wouldn't check-split, with bills running from under $15 (mine) up to $33.30. I ran the whole thing through Bistromath, collected cash (with some reasonable rounding up/down to simplify it), and then put the whole thing on my card.

I didn't have to hit an ATM all weekend after that, either....

[brewsternorth.livejournal.com]

...I love what it's called.

I know someone else (male, as it happens) who was hopeless at working out percentage tips, so actually got a sort of cheat-sheet printed at credit card size, showing what 10 or 15 or 20 percent of thus-and-such should be.

[setissma.livejournal.com]

I have to say, and I admittedly dine with other impoverished college students, so my perspective may be skewed, that I've never run into this happening. Everyone pays for their meal and their portion of a shared dessert/appetizer.

And honestly, if I were writing a column about issues with splitting the check, I think I'd lean more toward commentary on all the women I know who think it's charming/flirtatious/funny to be unable to calculate a 20% tip because it's completely acceptable for women to be mathematically illiterate. Sigh.

[marcmagus]

I find that odd, in that I actually experienced more bill-splitting problems of all sorts when I was in college than since. Maybe your friends are more numerate than mine?

[bodlon.livejournal.com]

The appliance story made me laugh. Never ONCE has my city's service gotten to my house before someone has nicked an appliance I've put out. It's the way of things here. Interestingly, we've seen the same problems with recyclables a couple of times, which is why I don't put my comingled bags out until the morning.

As for splitting the check, this practice is news to me. Apparently I run with a crowd who can either a) do math, b) puts in what they spent, or c) fronts each other for the bill.

Also, I think there's a snake fight component of my week. Oof.

[teleens-journal.livejournal.com]

Re. Splitting the check. I ran into this ONE time, but it was memorable.

A friend was in town for a conference and invited us to eat with his bigwig (of which he is not) friends. There was liquor and wine with the meal and everyone but the three of us ordered extravagantly and RIII and I only ordered slightly more than he did.

He ate very lightly and when the time came to split the check, one of the bigwigs said that we should all just split it nine ways or whatever it was, the person who had invited me only put in his fair share. And no more.

I noticed it, but I wasn't going to call out someone I thought was my friend in front of people I barely knew. I also knew that his money was tight and that he really couldn't afford to split the check in the way that the bigwigs wanted.

The bill was short. I'd put in what the bigwigs had asked for already, but I still wound up adding another $20 or so to try and make up for it and so did everyone else around the table.

Don't get me wrong - the person who had invited us put in what was fair for what he'd actually eaten, but was too much of a coward to say to those bigwigs, "Look, I didn't eat that much so I'm not going to split the check that way."

I'll only say this - due to other factors, we're no longer friends with this guy, but he never got caught for being the one who shorted everyone else.

I'll also add that when he made the invitation, he had intimated that our meal might be covered by the bigwigs. It was fortunate that I always carry enough money to cover whatever I order and then some.

If anyone ever asks me about him in the future for any reason, this is the story I'll tell.

I agree with you, that everyone should just pay for what they ordered rather than dividing it up, however in a large group it can be easy for the odd person out to feel bullied. In truth, I didn't think it was fair for us to split the check in that way, but I'd ordered enough not to argue about it and I wasn't quite as courageous as I am now when it came to standing up for myself in a large group. Not to mention that my husband was there and it would have embarrassed him if I'd been the one to make the fuss when he wasn't, sigh. Especially since at that time I was the one making all of the money, :(.

Don't get me wrong - I think our ex-friend an asshat (again, for more reasons than just this one), but in a group of eight or more people, it can be difficult to be the odd one (or more than one) out, :(.

[magentamn.livejournal.com]

This is why I always carry cash when I go out to eat, except with a few close friends who know how I feel. It's far easier to calculate what you actually owe and throw in cash, rounding up, than to try to figure it exactly so you can put you share on a credit card, and argue with people about how much you owe. No one refuses cash, no restaurant, I mean.

Also, in the Midwest, restaurants seem to be much more willing to split checks.

[wcg.livejournal.com]

About the Air Force blocking news sites, I suspect this is a combination of what I call "security weenie mentality" and the IT folks wanting to cover their asses. If classified information ends up on an unclassified machine, regardless of the source, DoD policy requires that the machine has to be taken offline and purged. (Typically a hard drive wipe and clean reinstall of the OS.) In this case I think the Air Force is being overly zealous, since the rest of DoD is content with the all-hands warning that went out.

[kel-reiley.livejournal.com]

i've never in my life (well since somewhere about the age of 15 when i started going out with friends) just split a check up even between ppl - we have always always just paid for what we ordered (approx.) and then all threw in whatever for the tip

or, more likely, someone would have a 20, and someone would only have singles - so the person with the 20 paid the check and the person with singles left the tip and paid the other person what they owed for their part of the meal

OR we ask the server if they can divide the bill up for us

granted, maybe they don't do that at super fancy places, but i'd still be all phoebe from friends and say 'um, no, i'm not paying $30 for that tiny salad i ate'

[jcbemis.livejournal.com]

re the air force stuff - I had a friend in another internet area say he had a friend in the air force who had been told it was because it would compromise the security status of the machines that had the secrets downloaded to them for reading from open sources or some BS like that

[heron61.livejournal.com]

On splitting the check.

Wow, that's really bizarre. Regardless of the size of the group or the cost of the restaurant, I've seen only two ways to handle this - if everyone or almost everyone had approximately the same thing for the same cost, then we figure out how much anyone who ordered less cost and split the rest or (more commonly) we simply divide it all up. This is even easier these days, since anyone with a good phone always has a calculator on hand.

A bill has been introduced in California to add historical contributions of LGBT people to school textbooks.

That's awesome news, given that CA is the other big textbook market than TX, it's likely that we'll soon see LGBT friendly textbooks appearing in every state not run by reactionary bigots.

[amberite.livejournal.com]

I wonder if our relative lack of trouble with the check thing (both over here and in rm's vicinity) is because being a creative type in a social circle of creative types means that many of your compatriots have at least a passing familiarity with the service industry.

I always find there's a correlation between degree of proximity to the service industry (actively work in > once worked in > know someone who does > know someone who has, and this includes sex industry as well as waiters: they're all tip-reliant professions) and understanding of how to actually pay tips, etc.

In California, and in DC, I have seen the "let's just split it evenly" thing more often than in Portland, presumably because people generally have more spare cash. I also saw my gaming crowd split the bill evenly in restaurants during the dot com boom (and had to annoy people by opting out, since I didn't have a dot com boom job) and then start doing that less during the crash.

[elusis.livejournal.com]

Re: snakes, this lived on the door of my last office.

[tekalynn.livejournal.com]

I'm reading the comments and thinking "Tax? Bzuh? What tax?"...and then remember that I live in a state with no sales or restaurant tax. So if I ever ate out of state, yes, I would probably be that clueless person.

[natf.livejournal.com]

I was doing the same but then in the UK VAT (Value Added Tax or the UK equivalent of sales tax as I understand it) is always included in product and/or menu prices. Some restaurants even include "service" (tips) in the prices. As an ex-waitress myself, I prefer to eat at restaurants that don't and prefer to put a cash tip on the table than add one to the credit/debit card bill because then the wait staff can take it home that evening.

As for splitting the bill (and more of a comment to rm, so apologies for tacking it on to this comment), I seem to have a very similar experience to some other commenters. I have never asked for seperate bills within one table/party and was never asked by anyone I served (but then I was waiting tables in the 80s so things may have changed). I have often been in a party that split the bill equally when I did not drink alcohol and/or had a cheaper meal and I do remember feeling hurt by that but not saying anything so as not to seem churlish (yanno, British and all that). I have also picked up the tab for a whole table when earning well and have had someone else pick up the tab for me when they knew I was not doing so well. I think, in the end, it all evens out. Not that I can afford to eat out these days…

[pantryslut.livejournal.com]

Reading all the comments about splitting the check has been fascinating, I must say. (I am in the camp of rarely encountering this problem.)

[sethg]

The snake fight article reminds me of this classic discussion.

“The new students come in here every fall, and are totally unequipped to handle the realities of graduate student life at CMU. Computability theory and lexical scoping are fine things to know about, but they just don't cut the mustard when somebody from the Psych department opens up on you with an Ingram set to full auto.”

[settiai]

Re: splitting the check, most of my customers (in larger groups, at least) seem split fairly evenly. About a 1/3 of them ask specifically for separate checks, another 1/3 simply do the math themselves and pay for whatever they owe (or, in some cases, the people who didn't eat much pay for theirs and then everyone else splits the rest of the total evenly), and the last 1/3 just split everything evenly. From time to time, the last one does spark some arguments at the table if someone feels like they're having to pay too much for what they ate/drank.

Most restaurant computer systems can handle splitting the check easily without much trouble, as long as the customers tell us in advance if it's a large group (more than 8 or so) that wants to do it. The big problem is that, with most computer systems used in restaurants, everything has to be rung in on one ticket for the kitchen's sake. Everything's then separated off individually.

It's typically done by seat number, and the server has to be very careful to make sure that everything is put in under the correct seat number - which is extremely difficult when the customers are switching seats, meaning we have to keep track of it on paper in order to manually fix any wrong seat numbers at the end. And, if we're busy, sometimes we tend to not keep quite as good tabs on whether or not the person originally in seat #2 moved to seat #6 after ordering drinks but before ordering food. If the customers wait until the very end of the meal to let us know that, by the way, they want separate checks, it can be very time consuming for the server (especially if it's during a rush) to try separating them and make sure everything's 100% correct.