sundries

Last night we had a lovely dinner with friends of Patty's. Unfortunately, Patty now also has a terrible cold. Between that and being assailed by a mosquito last night, we're not as rested as we could be.

It also looks like much if not all of my upcoming corporate time in Europe may be resolved today, which is also good in terms of making plans and knowing what's going on.

Last night when I got out of the subway, Union Square was filled with sukkaths made by artists and there was a random band unrelated to that playing old time music. It was New York at its finest.

I know I'm supposed to be reading the Cyteen sequel right now, but Exciting Academic Film Text just arrived, so that's my subway reading first.

cleolinda is having a discussion about grief, mourning and character death at her journal. It is a bucket of spoilers.

Stories of the bacha posh, girls presented as boys in Afghanistan to increase a family's status and luck. Everyone knows they are girls presented as boys, but this is still better than having no boys at all. At puberty, their status reverts back to their female sex, and the change in social freedoms and expectations can be jarring.

yesthatjill is compiling a list of gluten-free products.

Offensive, but also mostly smart and very funny: stereotype-based maps of Europe from the perspective of different nations (and gay men). It mostly stays this side of taste (because it makes fun of everyone both the observer and the viewed) in each map. On the other hand, there were a few where I raised an eyebrow and said "you went there? Really?" Anyway, it is interesting.

Hey, watch out for the porny Twitter bug.

The return of the nutcracker. In this case, a drink in Harlem that's part of the underground economy. Article is both interesting and full of the New York Times being appalling in that way only the New York Times can be (sellers include "young and older women" -- er? how about "women"?)

The senate is having a vote on whether to discuss a bill that contains DADT repeal language. The outcome is unclear. The whole thing is depressing.

In reading this batch of letters in the New York Times I got thinking about how people get really freaked out by this idea of apologizing as a society or group for wrongs done. "I didn't own slaves, so why should I have to when I didn't do anything wrong?" or "I'm a guy, but I don't hate women, why should I have to deal with women mistrusting me?" Now, there's a lot of things at play in there, but aside from the obvious, one of them is about the nuance of words. ( Read more... )

Hey, can I ask you all to try to keep sizeism down in comments? It's an ongoing problem. Exercise won't make everyone thin; some skinny people just come that way; fat people aren't stupid; and a real woman isn't determined by her BMI or her genitalia. HAES, the evils of HFCS, dieting if that's your choice, eating better, our nation's increasingly sedentary lifestyle, beauty standards, etc. are, however, all welcome topics. But try to pause before you type it.

characters like me

Dear New Fandom:

Hey, we all like an awesome new show! Awesome! It's nice to meet you.

Among a whole bunch of other things, I'm a queer person, and this means a few things. Let's talk about them for a little bit, okay?

1. It is not unreasonable for me to want to see a character whose experiences are similar to mine on shows that I like.

2. It is reasonable for me to judge how watchable I find a show based on whether I can relate to and/or believe in the characters and their world. While queerness isn't the only item that matters in this regard, it is a critical one.

3. When I say I want a queer character on a TV show, in a book, or in a film, that has nothing to do with wanting to write slash -- even if I am, in fact, a queer person who is also a slash reader and writer.

4. Being able to slash characters is not an acceptable or adequate replacement for actual, canonically queer characters.

5. Neither is "maybe the characters whose personal lives we don't know anything about are gay." Yes, they provide and opportunity for the show writers, but they aren't good enough in terms of representation as they stand now.

6. When I talk about wanting to see queer characters, please do not assume that automatically means men. Also do not assume I mean gay or lesbian over bisexual, or that I would not welcome a trans character. When I say queer, I mean queer in all its QUILTBAG-y diversity.

7. Wanting to see queer characters on TV isn't about titillation or political correctness for me.

8. So when I talk about this, don't, by the way, put words in my mouth. I've been queer a long time. I've also been a fan a long time. And I've also been ranting about media and entertainment for a long time, because that's what I do both for fun and while wearing some of my professional hats. Let the queer people speak for themselves.

So when you say things that make me feel the need to say these things? To me, it seems like you're having a hard time imagining all the possibilities for love, romance, and fucking out there, or what it's like to live in a world where your stories aren't on TV or the big screen most of the time beyond a wink, a nod, and, if you're lucky, some too-often oddly heteronormative fanfiction.

I know you love our awesome show. I love our awesome show too! I just wish it would have more of a place for me. So when you tell me I'm unreasonable for wanting our awesome show to be even more awesome? Well, I get sad and angry. And I wonder why you think that.

Why do you?

Best,

RM