poll

[rm]

1. What about yourself do you have absolute unshakeable faith in?
1a. Why?

2. One day you will utter this sentence: "You wouldn't believe what I've done to get here." Where's "here"?
2a. What's the response?
2b. What did you do?

3. What story are you compelled to tell over and over again?
3a. Why?

Comments

[spiralflames.livejournal.com]

i started a response to your Q's earlier and erased it..mainly because it was bullshit. so i'm back and compelled by a rather unattractive moment of honesty.
**
1. What about yourself do you have absolute unshakeable faith in?
nothing. no thing. perhaps my teaching, but in bad moments, sometimes not even that.
1a. Why?
because i have never been able to perform without thoughts of an audience..if i feel beautiful, it's because someone has told me that. which makes me vulnerable for someone's opinion to the opposite. sometimes that's just insecurity, other times i like to see it as just being receptive to others' perceptions. but i've never been able to look someone in the face and TRULY not care what they think, even if i know they;re idiots.

2. One day you will utter this sentence: "You wouldn't believe what I've done to get here." Where's "here"?
2a. What's the response?
2b. What did you do?
"here" is where i am musically. people are always amazed, since even educated people seem to persist in the fantasy that music is somehow zapped into the brain by some music fairy, and is not the product of bone-breaking, soul crushing WORK against a society that persists in thinking that what you DO is 'a nice hobby.' what'd i do? not much. i can't run around justifying my life all the time. or i can, but it doesn't do any good...


3. What story are you compelled to tell over and over again?
3a. Why?
*
hmmm...i seem to have a handful of them, usually about the time when i was an undergrad, which was really the most intense time of my life in ALL respects. why..because the stories are sweet, funny/sad and hold up over time. and they keep the memories, and the people in them, alive.

thanks for provoking some serious thought this morning. and i'm glad you stood up against the bank assholes.