poll

[rm]

1. What about yourself do you have absolute unshakeable faith in?
1a. Why?

2. One day you will utter this sentence: "You wouldn't believe what I've done to get here." Where's "here"?
2a. What's the response?
2b. What did you do?

3. What story are you compelled to tell over and over again?
3a. Why?

Comments

[random-girl.livejournal.com]

1. What about yourself do you have absolute unshakeable faith in?
1a. Why?
I am a creative person, and the things I create do not suck. Why? I have, over the course of my life, always thought of myself as someone who desperately must create. And when my things did suck (and do suck, its an ongoing process), I just keep doing them. Keep trying. Its a primal need to make things, from journaling to writing stories to making jewlery to the stupid Christmas crafts that seem to make people smile even if they come out wrong. I define myself as someone who makes things, and if I doubted that, I'd doubt the defition of who I am.

2. One day you will utter this sentence: "You wouldn't believe what I've done to get here." Where's "here"?
Already did that. I was in bed with my hubby on our honeymoon.

2a. What's the response?
Him: "I'm pretty clear on what you did...wedding, sex, tickets..."

2b. What did you do?
I overcame a deep fear inside myself that I could ever love and trust someone again. Forget the wedding, which, while nightmarish, was one bad dream before the good. I had a man who broke me inside through physical, mental, and emotional means until I was contemplating killing myself to escape him. I came all the way back up from that place and got away from him. Built a life. Defended that life from him and all comers. And was lucky enough to trust myself to find someone who was not like that. Is not like that. Will never be like that. Someone I can let down my defenses in front of. Someone I can protect and love and tickle fight and occasionally hurt accidentally, but who will never, ever, hurt me that way.

3. What story are you compelled to tell over and over again?
There are a few. One is the story of my dad torturing me as a child because I could not say my name--it's comprised of two syllabels I couldn't pronounce properly. So I generally left out the "L" sound, and changed the "r" sound to "w." So I couldn't say "Lori" I said "Owie." And my dad would say "You're name is Owie" and I'd say, "no, daddy, no, my name is Owie!" until I was red in the face.

3a. Why?
I'm not sure. I am the closest to my dad of anyone in the family. We are good friends, as well as father and daughter. He has always protected me. Always taken care of me. My mother hasn't always been there, and has occasionally been the one dealing the badness out. I thinkt he story is funny because it was a rare instance of my father's sense of humor turning a little dark; it never got any darker than that, but its an insight into where I get my dark sensibilities, and a warning not to go to far and hurt other people (maybe). Or maybe I just think it's funny. Hard to tell.