non-science
Apr. 23rd, 2008 08:26 am![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
rmSorry, new and improved version. I left out some important options.
I realize this is entirely non-scientific and because LJ skews towards women even more unscientific for that. But I tend to think these little exercises still have their uses and least when it comes to reminding people about privilege (or I may turn out to be totally wrong).
ETA:
to answer some frequent questions:
1. Unwanted contact from a person you are in a relationship with should be read as a sexual overture (possibly entirely appropriate but you weren't in the mood) was made that you rejected, BUT the rejection was then not heeded in a fashion that you feel harmed you/violated your person/rights.
2. I know, I left out a choice for boss/coworker/clergy member/teacher/professional relationship/person in position of authority -- please put it in the acquaintance category. This was noticed too late to redo the poll and I'll note it when I do the results summary post.
3. If you are trans, genderqueer, etc. and want to answer in more than one category based on how you were presenting at the time, that's fine.
4. The way LJ shows the answers to this isn't actually that statistically interesting to what I'm trying to capture, and I will eventually make a post about some other things I'm seeing somewhat buried in the numbers.
5. Yes, your answers are viewable to everyone. There's a point to that too that will be discussed later as well.
6. Feel free to link to this in your own journal.
7. THANK YOU.
[Poll #1175760]
I realize this is entirely non-scientific and because LJ skews towards women even more unscientific for that. But I tend to think these little exercises still have their uses and least when it comes to reminding people about privilege (or I may turn out to be totally wrong).
ETA:
to answer some frequent questions:
1. Unwanted contact from a person you are in a relationship with should be read as a sexual overture (possibly entirely appropriate but you weren't in the mood) was made that you rejected, BUT the rejection was then not heeded in a fashion that you feel harmed you/violated your person/rights.
2. I know, I left out a choice for boss/coworker/clergy member/teacher/professional relationship/person in position of authority -- please put it in the acquaintance category. This was noticed too late to redo the poll and I'll note it when I do the results summary post.
3. If you are trans, genderqueer, etc. and want to answer in more than one category based on how you were presenting at the time, that's fine.
4. The way LJ shows the answers to this isn't actually that statistically interesting to what I'm trying to capture, and I will eventually make a post about some other things I'm seeing somewhat buried in the numbers.
5. Yes, your answers are viewable to everyone. There's a point to that too that will be discussed later as well.
6. Feel free to link to this in your own journal.
7. THANK YOU.
[Poll #1175760]
![[identity profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/openid.png){kind=small}
no subject
Date: 2008-04-23 09:53 pm (UTC)If the "guy on the corner" says "Fuck you white boy, I'll kick your ass.", then no, it's not actual sexual harassment.
But, if he says "Fuck you white boy, I'll kick your ass. You fucking faggot." is it then sexual in nature, because perceived masculinity and gender preference have been brought into it?
Or is it not sexual harassment until it's "Fuck you white boy, I'll kick your ass. You fucking faggot. I'll beat you down and put my cock in your ass to teach you a lesson." if then?
Another thing to remember is that among certain cultures, the rapists would consider themselves masculine, while the male victim would be considered the "faggot".
My primary point is that for those type of people, intimidating anyone is a thrill for them. Whoever walks by, and is their victim of the moment, is incidental.
Or by definition here, is something "sexual" simply because the harassing party is male, and the target is female? In comparison, "Hey baby, nice tits. Can I have your number? " sounds far less harassing (if not almost polite, in a sick way) compared to threats of violence.
As for the "sidewalk chicken" example, how often does it happen to you? Seldom enough that you would notice and be upset and make note of it if a guy tries to crowd you off the sidewalk, or frequent enough that it's just another factor of walking in the city? (Just like avoiding dog shit.) If it's not that often, then gender is an issue. And it reinforces that bullies will tend to bully everyone, they may just bully each gender somewhat differently. (It also raises the issue that men tend to deal with these things on a regular basis, but seldom discuss or consider it.)
Then again, perhaps you grew up and live in kinder, gentler neighborhoods than myself.
no subject
Date: 2008-04-23 10:23 pm (UTC)No, it's not sexual harassment- it's bullying, it's harassment, but not sexual harassment.
I also think that, in order to be sexual harassment, the harassment must be specifically of a sexual nature. The man (or woman) who calls someone a faggot because it's an insult isn't a sexual harasser; the guy who says "Hey faggot, come suck my dick," IS a sexual harasser. And I don't think that sexual harassment is something that only men do (comments like that, btw, belie your assertion that you don't consider yourself a victim. Your comments have "I am an aggrieved male" written all over them.)
As for the "sidewalk chicken" example, how often does it happen to you?
Not often, but when it does, the perpetrators are exclusively male. However, I almost never even see men do that to one another. I guess men here have different ways of asserting their masculinity. Even my male partner has had it happen to him only a handful of times in his entire life.
I'm not disputing your assertion that bullies bully everyone; I dispute your assertion that all bullying is sexual harassment. Sexual harassment, in fact, isn't even always bullying. The harasser who thinks that s/he is a genuinely nice person and that they would make the victim very happy is still a harasser.
perhaps you grew up and live in kinder, gentler neighborhoods than myself.
Oh, yawn. While I do live in a nice neighborhood now (by "nice" I mean "clean and relatively safe", not "wealthy") I spent my teens & early 20s in the Gulfton Ghetto. I'm no stranger to homelessness, poverty, and very bad neighborhoods.