since I posted the NYTimes one

[rm]

CNN does their own not very interesting article on being gay in Hollywood.

http://www.cnn.com/2008/SHOWBIZ/TV/09/30/gay.in.hollywood/index.html

Also, can we PLEASE stop using the word 'lifestyle'? Lifestyle refers to how much money I make and where I like to vacation. Unless I list fucking as a hobby, it doesn't reply to my relationships, thanks.

Comments

[darthhellokitty.livejournal.com]

I hate the lifestyle thing. I'd say that my inlaws, who've retired to a gorgeous planned community and love to travel, have a lifestyle. Most people just have... a life.

[bodlon.livejournal.com]

Unless I list fucking as a hobby...

This so wants to be about Jack.

Ahem.

Concur wholeheartedly on the lifestyle thing. My gay lifestyle includes being skint, not doing the dishes, and spending more time at the computer than at the gym. It's about as interesting as my gay agenda.

Is there a Gay Lifestyle?

[gement.livejournal.com]

I confess, while the people they're talking about probably aren't living a Gay Lifestyle, I might be. I have sexuality as a hobby: talking about it, acting on it, going to conferences, answering people's uninformed questions on the Internet about it. (I'm actually living a Queer Perv lifestyle, but it's all part of the same discussion.)

I was playing Devil's Advocate in a "you can't tell by looking" discussion the other day. Because no, you can't tell by looking. Many many people of whatever minority sexual identification are completely under the radar, not because they're hiding, but because they're just people.

But some people I can tell by looking, because they're flagging. I've never met a heavy-set woman with buzzed hair, multiple facial piercings, camo pants and big stompy boots who identified as 100% straight. I just haven't met them. My mental shorthand defines it as "socially gay" or "politically gay" or "activist gay". None of those words really cover it, but there is a choice to be up front and out loud about things, as you're well aware. After today, I think "lifestyle gay" might be added to the list of mental connotations.

My sister's at Folsom right now. That's definitely a lifestyle thing. An ex-lover of mine is making his entire living publishing books and traveling the world as a sex educator.

This is all a tangent, obviously. It doesn't excuse the media from being sloppy about this. But I think there's a squares/rectangles distinction here: Not all gays buy into the stereotypical Lifestyle, but some people are clearly Lifestyle Gays.

I had a parallel realization at an SF con once, where there was a panel on "The Splintering of Fandom," and I thought they'd be discussing the overchoice of media options that's taking away our common geek cultural reference base. Nope, they wanted to talk about the catty infighting of the history of the incestuous Convention Fan Lifestyle crowd. Bit of a difference of definition of Fandom: I meant "all fans" and she meant "lifestyle fans in The Community." See The Gay Community and The Black Community.

Anyway. No, they still shouldn't be sloppy about it.

None of those words really cover it

[stardragonca.livejournal.com]

Trendy? Chique? Nothing of substance comes with a uniform, the heraldic value of flagging not withstanding.
My life is not a fashion choice, nor is yours, and that's what they're trying to reduce it to.

[stardragonca.livejournal.com]

I have being trying to assign meaning to the word Lifestyle since I was fifteen. I fail.
(I hate that word.)

[stardragonca.livejournal.com]

My sister reminds me that the word 'lifestyle' entered the public lexicon when newspapers renamed the 'Women's section' the 'Lifestyle' section.

[gement.livejournal.com]

Oooh, I didn't know that. *dives for the research materials*

[kismet76.livejournal.com]

I live in the "south" and we are not that backwards...that is upsetting as well...

[julesndairyland.livejournal.com]

This is brilliant - Lifestyle: Unless I list fucking as a hobby, it doesn't reply to my relationships

[popfiend.livejournal.com]

Lifestyle implies choice, which is why it sounds wrong to my ear (and hopefully everyone else's as well).

/my 2 useless cents

[vondow.livejournal.com]

I just realized after the recent turnover trimming my team to six people plus one other lead and, as far as I know, none of them are gay. Maybe this is like other people's workplace and that is why this is still a news story. Well, kinda, the project manager that came by today, totally gay.

[marzipan-pig.livejournal.com]

My coworker (around my age, education level, and general mix of dorkiness and semi-hipness) will sometimes comment that my life seems much more interesting than his (married w/2 kids in the suburbs). Invariably it's when I've spent the weekend doing laundry or cleaning, but sure maybe I hung out with a few people (for maybe 20 minutes each?) who I can't easily categorize in relationship words.

What's funny is I think of *him* as having more of an identifiable 'lifestyle' than I do.