maybe if I write this I will feel better

[rm]

While my coming out process was both vague and not narratively interesting, I've noted before and will surely note again that V for Vendetta (the graphic novel, thanks) played a role in it. I wrote this for Yuletide a few years ago, and if you ask me to tell you why fanfiction matters, this piece is part of that story.

I cannot believe that I sat on the couch last night watching the men vying to be president seriously (such as it is) debate whether healthcare is a right or a privilege. Leaving aside matters of capitalism and socialism, our broke ass country and our ideological fears -- doesn't everyone have a right to live? to be helped if they can be helped? Isn't it simple? At least philosophically?

So today I am angry.

I am angry that someone I've known for fifteen years is facing a medical crisis that may very well affect the rest of his life: if not in terms of health, then surely in terms of finances. Because he's uninsured.

I am angry that his partner is facing racism and insensitivity from a medical staff that doesn't seem to understand that we fight for those we love, even when they're uninsured, even when we're scared.

I am angry that I have so many friends who are also ill and uninsured and facing what seems to be a constantly combative medical system.

I am angry that my mother, who is insured, had to pay for an MRI out of pocket because her insurance company told her she'd have to wait 6 months to have another one, eventhough the suspicion of cancer was there then.

I am angry that my own very real medical condition which has ruined my teeth, given me permanent nerve damage, increased my risk of cancer and has caused me immense amounts of pain went undiagnosed for 30 years because I was merely a woman who was oversensitive in the eyes of doctor after doctor and even in the eyes of my family.

I am angry at a medical establishment that wants me to be ashamed of how I look, because of the very same disease they weren't willing to discover I had.

I am angry at doctors who tell you to lose weight before they even look at your stats.

I am angry at the medical fetishization of pregnancy and aging, that taxes our system and harms the experience of natural processes when drastic interventions are not needed.

I am angry at a drug industry that concentrates on the most lucrative therapies instead of the most needed therapies and pushes pills with significant side-effects and low efficacy for non-life threatening conditions.

I am angry that my trans friends have to be declared mentally ill and then save and save and save to afford treatment insurance deems cosmetic.

I am angry that a woman I fence with couldn't even get the shattered teeth removed from her mouth when she was in a bicycling accident, because again, just cosmetic!

I am angry (and grateful and sad) that every broke, struggling, one bit of bad luck (or less, some of them are already there) away from a system that won't help them person I know is digging deep to help the person who won the bad luck sweepstakes this week. But I don't want these lessons in the beauty of our friends or the eternally exhausting nature of triage based on convenience and money.

I am so angry.

I am angry that sitting on the couch last night watching the debate with Patty, I felt like Ruth and Valerie.

And so I am angry at the people who tell me the results of this election won't really matter, won't really change my life, won't really put me at risk, won't really be the possible end of all things.

I am angry at people who tell me to calm down, as if I am merely a hysteric. As if my friends aren't at very real risk of dying from failed policy.

The election matters, and lives do, in fact, hang in the balance.

And if you think that doesn't include yours because you are insured, healthy, financially stable, straight and not in the military, well good for fucking you.

But it's now looking like equal marriage rights will be outlawed in California. You know what that affects other than human dignity? Health insurance.

Get it?

Comments

[lukumidagger.livejournal.com]

Being Latino I will say this...I am ANGRY that there are 12 million illegal aliens in the United States that suck the Hospitals dry increasing the amount we pay in health insurance to cover us...I am Angry that pretty soon my business will be forced to pay higher taxes because we make over $250,000 a year, and I promise we will lay people off...so think about that when you vote for Obama...Which will cause more people to not have Health Insurance...OK?...Just think about that...

[rm.livejournal.com]

I spoke neither for nor against any candidate in this post. Nor did I blame anyone for the pervasive healthcare failure that is currently in place in our country. Coming to my journal at a time when one of my friends may be dying and blaming me for your economic fears is deeply unacceptable.

[natf.livejournal.com]

*hugs* agreed!

[tsarina.livejournal.com]

A-fucking-men. What is it with the lack of basic manners? Was everyone raised by rabid coyotes?

[heron61.livejournal.com]

Not just yes, but hell yes! Obama's proposed health insurance plan is from my PoV vastly inadequate, but sadly it's far better than what we currently have and will at least make certain that one of my closest friends will not be denied health insurance because of a pre-existing condition.

I'm fairly certain that McCain is going to lose, but it's still far too close given that McCain's answer to healthcare, financial crisis, and in fact everything that affects anyone who is not vastly wealthy all comes down to "suck it up".

[lonebear.livejournal.com]

get my number from Sue de G and call late tomorrow. I have some possible contacts through my father. (Board of one hospital, high up in the Brooklyn DA's office, worked for Golden, and Holstein).

[feyandstrange.livejournal.com]

You're not alone. I just haven't had the strength to scream lately.

Although in all honesty, a lot of health care in CA does cover domestic partners; I'm on one such now. It's the Federal benefits, like taxes, that will be worst hit.

But don't give up on marriage in CA yet. I haven't.

I have lost my shit sometimes and started hysterically ranting at people and claiming that "those people" want me dead because "those people" don't believe in Social Security or subsidized health care being taken out of their taxes. Someone invariably tells me that I am overreacting and how dare I call those nice people murderers?

Oh, right, it isn't murder if I die by neglect. Just manslaughter.

I also know that it's wrong of me to wish that I could cripple or infect "those people" with something their insurance fails to cover and watch them take the same long fall that I did. But sometimes I wish I could.

Because the next poor bastard who takes that fall may have resistant TB, and I kind of hope they cough on your precious self.

A long time ago I wrote a rant - responding to the Matthew Shepard killing - about how the Religious Reich can't claim that with one breath they want to save and convert us and yet encourage hate crimes with the same damn mouth - because we can't be converted if we're dead.

I am beginning to suspect they've decided to convert by the sword - or by slow starvation.

[feyandstrange.livejournal.com]

And entirely separate from my anger: is there a fund for your friend (and my acquaintance) to which one can donate, yet?

[rm.livejournal.com]

Not yet. I suspect, at the latest, something will be put together this weekend when his family flies out from the west coast. I think there may wind up being two -- one for his medical expenses and a more immediate fund to help them with immediate household expenses.

[feyandstrange.livejournal.com]

Thanks. I've been offline more than usual and was wondering if I had missed a post for such a thing.

[better-late24.livejournal.com]

This election effects us all...the state of our nation is grim, right now. Even if you have insurance or a good job, what happens if you lose that job? We may be OK right now, but you don't need things to fall apart in your life before you recognize that things are shit out there right now. And the wrong sequence of events can rip apart even the most fortunate of us.

I work in the insurance industry. I work at an agency (as opposed to a company) and in property & casualty (not life & health or personal lines). Funnily enough, we're in a "soft" market with most coverages, meaning prices are dropping...the exception to that? Health insurance. I'm fortunate enough to have really solid health insurance as a result of being at a company that knows insurance, and actually gives a shit about its employees. This is the only company I've ever worked at where I've experienced that. I could get offered double the salary to leave and wouldn't. Good benefits are absolutely invaluable and ridiculously rare.

I'm also fortunate enough to know how to pick apart an insurance policy to know exactly what is and isn't covered. They're put together to screw you over, and most people don't know how to look for that. Hell, even I get confused as hell reading them, and I'm trained to do it. And you know what? A company can tell you that something isn't covered, and maybe it really is, but you don't know how to fight them on it. You're not a professional, and they take advantage. And that's if you're even fortunate enough to actually have coverage.

The problem is that health coverage is treated as a commodity, when the right to medical care should be just that, a right. It shouldn't work on some sort of sick supply and demand system, because EVERYONE needs health care. And being able to go to the ER and not be turned away is NOT health care. It's disgusting to me that people profit off screwing people out of the things we need the most. The whole system needs to be revamped, and that's not easy.

But the first step? Vote for Obama. McCain's $5,000 health care credit is a joke. That the man even pretends to care about those of us that aren't in the upper 1% of society is incredible. You have to look no further than the things he's proposing.

I've been a fan of Barack Obama's since I heard him speak in 2004 at the DNC. I live in Illinois; he's my senator. And reading his most recent book on a 2 day train ride, I was blown away by how much this guy really does get it. The Republicans can try and twist him around and imply he's a terrorist, say we don't know him and can't trust him, but I honestly believe it just isn't going to work this time around. Most people are too aware of how our country fell to shambles in the last 8 years. Yeah, there are plenty of people out there that are ignorant, or take the hate Fox News spews out as the truth, or are too racist to even consider voting for him.

But a couple of things give me hope. I'm the only so-called "liberal" in my family. My parents and sister are very Catholic...my dad most so of all. Hell, he's literally told me that Obama is a "Kool Aid drinking liberal." And yet all of them, and my old semi-racist grandparents, all down in Florida, are voting for Obama. I never thought I'd see the day when my dad would vote for someone who wasn't pro-life.

And that was an extremely long ramble on my part... I can't help it, this stuff matters to me. You're not alone in understanding how vital this is.

[stardragonca.livejournal.com]

I feel like this is almost off topic, and I apologise, but the V for Vendetta (my knowledge of which, both the graphic novel, and the film ,comes from online plot synopsises and the odd discussion) is weep inducing beautiful, and I thank you for writing it.

[stardragonca.livejournal.com]

the V For Vendetta fic

[natf.livejournal.com]

I am angry for all of you in the US. I am grateful that, however flawed our NHS is, we have free healthcare in the UK.

Thank you for your clarity of words. *hugs*

[natf.livejournal.com]

P.S. That V fic was beautiful.

[stardragonca.livejournal.com]

Herself can write!

[stardragonca.livejournal.com]

Herself can write!

[dakabn.livejournal.com]

I have to somehow pay over $16,000 for just one night in the hospital because I didn't have insurance. Ironically, one of the few things I remember about the wreck is I was considering getting Insurance that week.

I just want to know WHY it costs that much for ONE night in the hospital.

And why years before I had to pay over $400 for blood tests (I did have insurance at that time but stupid paperwork, wrong clinic, etc...)

The US health industry is truly a sickening, greedy bastard.

[brenda927.livejournal.com]

I work as a floor nurse and I can't hardly figure out the bills from the hospital.
I know part of the reason meds, supplies, tests, bloodwork, etc... cost more then it should is because there is no bill for the person who does the work involved (pharmacy, nurses, aides, transport, lab, and so on) but still it's way jacked up.
and the insurance companies are crazy powerful in my little opinion. Someone needs to put them in check. Same with the price of drugs.

[dakabn.livejournal.com]

I live in Canada now. US could take a lesson.

[brenda927.livejournal.com]

I am a lucky one. While not rich, at this moment my insurance is good. I won't have it when I 'retire' (I will never get to do that and I know it) but I have it and I am thankful every single day for it.
I am all to aware of how lack of insurance is killing people. It seems like at least once a week I am caring for a patient who has no insurance and is very scared about how they will afford this. Since I work on the cancer floor it makes it even more life altering because many of my patients are looking at a very long haul. Some have chosen to not try treatment because of money. How shitty is that?

You should NOT calm down. Everyone else needs to get pissed

I was sent by <lj user=cointeach>

[its-just-me.livejournal.com]

http://its-just-me.livejournal.com/1595411.html?view=5744403#t5744403

It seems we have similar views. Oh, HI!! : )