Writer's Block: The Greenest Grass

[rm]

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Where do I start with the problems with this question?

Gender essentialism flame-war Friday? or the rather obvious questions of privilege?

And that aside, is this rocket science?

Men are less likely to be raped; and more likely to earn higher wages for comparable work.

Women are more likely to get free drinks in bars and are expected to dedicate a higher percentage of their on-average lower incomes to maintaining their appearance.

And when people point this out, some asshole always shows up to say "but it's so hard to be a man; we're made to feel bad for desiring women all the time."

Oi. LJ!

Comments

[winter-ruins.livejournal.com]

... Okay, I can't resist. Some (very female, actually) asshole here to show up.

Men get raped quite often too, they just don't report it because that's womanly.

Men are more likely to get beat up or killed for acting outside of their gender roles.

[britgeekgrrl.livejournal.com]

*stares, aghast at the Writers' Block*

So, who wants to sendrona_emo and the LJ staff a gift-wrapped Clue-By-Four?

[brewsternorth.livejournal.com]

I know, right? *eyeroll*

On the other hand, LJ will be rubbing their hands gleefully because ooh, made 'em write.

[frakkin-addict.livejournal.com]

Great answer. Thanks. :)

[redstapler.livejournal.com]

I will leave my icon to speak for me.

[redstapler.livejournal.com]

Women are made guilty for being women, too.

And that's just addressing people who adhere to arbitrary gender roles.

Your point. (S)he is invalid.

Gavin & Stacey

[keith418.livejournal.com]

I am interested to discover what you make of this series, because I think it indirectly addresses some of the questions raised here. On some of the UK TV shows I have seen, women are presented as being more flawed than they are in many of the same kinds of programs in the US. But the effect is to make them more human and, in the end, more sympathetic and real.

When William S. Burroughs described the US as a "matriarchal society" was he just being insane? Or did he have a point?

[dulcinbradbury.livejournal.com]

She said that women are more likely to be raped. Even adjusting for reporting, this is still true.


Gender roles gets tricky. There's a lower tolerance for any deviation among men, so, I suspect women get more flexibility in minor deviation.

But major deviation? Women in the military or other male-dominated environments, FTM trannies, etc. I'm not sure the gap is as wide.

[winter-ruins.livejournal.com]

Women are still allowed in the military. Men aren't allowed to join female dominated systems (... for instance, girls can join the boy scounts but boys can't join the girl scouts. Obviously, not as big a problem as say joining the military and getting raped/belittled, but at least women have the option).

I know both FTMs and MTFs, and it seems to me at least that MTFs have the harder transition (obviously not trying to shrink the hardships of FTMs, since I've seen that it can be very difficult too).

I'm not trying to say that women have it easier than men by any means, but I'm saying both genders have their own sets of problems, and I think it's both unfair and difficult to compare and say who has it harder. For instance, gay men have a much tougher time in every part of society than gay women.



..... Also, you should know that right now I'm trying to procrastinate studying for the final I have this afternoon, and otherwise probably wouldn't've jumped into some random strangers post.

[rm.livejournal.com]

I am also perhaps the wrong person to be lecturing about gender variance.

Re: Gavin & Stacey

[erin-trying.livejournal.com]

Quote from a man that shot his wife appropriate? Perhaps not!

[contentlove.livejournal.com]

Yeah, I just snorted when I saw the question and figured it was picked by someone rather young and unexperienced.

[dulcinbradbury.livejournal.com]

Err... was that addressed to me or the other commentator? Because I'd never dream of lecturing you on gender variance. Nor did I intend any of that as a lecture at all, in truth. More as some musings on societal reactions to such things.

[delle.livejournal.com]

women are allowed in the military; but in the US, they are restricted as to what positions they may be assigned. Also, please reference the incredibly high statistic for women in the military to be raped and have their (almost always) male superiors not take the women's complaints serious (ref: the young marine that was forced to continued to work with the man that she alleged raped her - until he killed her).

also, girls are only allowed in Venture Scout crews - with is designed to be a co-ed scouting activity for 14-17 yr olds. Venture Scouts do not earn Eagle awards, although there is an equivalent honor (as there is for Girl Scouts, the Gold Award, although Girl Scouts attaining the award tend not to get equal publicity for their achivement). No, boys are not allowed in Girl Scouts - for the simple reason that statistically when boys are in an activity, THEY run the conversation, THEY determine the activities. Girl Scouts is designed to allow and encourage girls to take initiative, something that does not happen in wider society.

(Spoken as a 9 yr Girl Scout Leader and the proud mother of an Eagle Scout. I know whereof I speak)

[jkpolk.livejournal.com]

I think it's just hard to be a human, no matter what's planted between your legs or in your genes.

[bernmarx.livejournal.com]

The question was "Who has it easier?". An answer does not imply that either gender has a free ride, only that when all the chits and points are added up, one gender has it easier than the other (setting aside the annoying presupposition that there are but two discrete genders).

When all the chits and points are added up, males have it much, much easier.

As a male, I'm all for having a civil discussion about whatever obstacles it is that males experience, but as a rational being, I'm all for not being deluded.

[stardragonca.livejournal.com]

Which is harder: being a man , or being a great, big, whiny, sucky*-baby!


*For maximum effect, this has to be pronounced in the proper Atlantic Canadian manner: SOO-kee BAY bee!

[brewsternorth.livejournal.com]

That is also true, but even with the deck stacked against humanity in general, some have it easier than others.

[angstzeit.livejournal.com]

Who has it easier? Someone else. Always someone else.

[meirion.livejournal.com]

I know both FTMs and MTFs, and it seems to me at least that MTFs have the harder transition

Social transition, perhaps (although it's not plain sailing the other way, let me tell you). Medical transition: well, as far as I can see there's a better chance of having genitals functioning fairly close to the ones one should have been born with (should that be one's choice, and it happens to be mine) if one's MTF than FTM.

[kel-reiley.livejournal.com]

i'm ignoring all logic and reason and still saying men, just b/c i feel like it
:D

[bernmarx.livejournal.com]

I know where you're coming from. I've ranted about the same subjects myself. There are some pretty crappy things that come with being a male.

On the other hand, if I had to choose, walking down a dark street at night, I'd rather have to worry that the women I passed thought I might be a rapist than that the men I passed might rape me*. For that matter, what proportion of men ever experience anything other than hurt feelings about being classed as a potential rapist? A very small proportion get imprisoned from false accusations (and a small proportion of men are sexually assaulted), but nowhere near the percent of women who are raped. So if the best you (and I) can do is, "It makes me sad to think that women think that of me," sorry, that's not even close.

* Edited for typo.

[acathartes.livejournal.com]

I think you have the right answer here.

[eumelia.livejournal.com]

This is all very odd.
The question I'm reading in the box is It's our birthday, a day when you get to indulge in all your favorite things. So indulge us—what's your favorite LJ entry? and this is obviously the question the rest of the world is seeing.

What is this person asking?

[kalmn.livejournal.com]

When we talk about rape, it just paints all boys as "potential perpetrators" and all girls as "potential victims"—think about the menz!

http://shakespearessister.blogspot.com/2009/04/what-about-boys-part-one-billion.html