not waiting for the die-off

[rm]

The other day Frank Rich wrote a welcome op-ed in the New York Times that looked at how the resistance to marriage equality is both ludicrous and not likely to be significant enough to continue to control U.S. laws in another decade or so.

This piece, like many other essays, speeches, LJ posts and the like references the idea that younger people support marriage equality and, well, older people who don't will die off soon. Generational chance. Patience and we win.

I hate it. And not out of some spiritual enlightenment that thinks "waiting for the die-off" is both creepy and perhaps even morally suspect, although, I could certainly make those arguments with sincerity.

I'm also not pissed off about being asked to have patience. I don't have it, but I don't have it when I cook dinner either, so it's really neither here nor there.

No, I'm pissed off that minds will not be changed. That marriage equality will not be achieved through people admitting they were wrong, but through people just ceasing to be.

Yes, it's with a petty sense of vengeance that I loathe the die-off theory. I want bigots to change their minds. I want them to be ashamed.

It's pointless. And it's vicious.

But can you blame me, for also wanting to be vindicated?

But really, I should get over it.

And people should stop being creepy and talking about the damn die-off theory. It's not giving anyone the moral high ground.

Comments

[cantkeepsilent.livejournal.com]

I think that there are two things happening. The larger is that hearts are being changed. 538 suggests that marriage parity acceptance is growing at 2% per year, and that's got to be faster than people are dying. It's people realizing that they have gay friends, neighbors, and co-workers, and I think that the desire to be fair to real people is woven into the American fabric once you can convince them that They are really Us. I don't know if they're ashamed, but to be honest if someone is showing up for a party that started thirty years ago I'd still rather give them a drink than a lecture. But that's me.

The other side is that I want politicians to be acutely aware that society is going to be dramatically different in fifteen years. Not only are gay rights going to be codified, but the leaders who fought against the last few battles are going to go down in history alongside George Wallace. If you want to be a leader in the future, you'd better notice which way the crowd is headed. Maybe the die-off metaphor still doesn't encompass the totality and speed of the revolution, but whatever makes conservative leaders recognize the futility of their resistance is good with me.