he wants you to bray. like a donkey. really.

[rm]

Since there are so many new people here and someone just said the word "braying" in another and completely unrelated post, it's time for Fun Stories from When I Was a Dominatrix.

So one day, we're all sitting in our stupid little locker room where we wait for clients to come in and the phone rings. Reception answers and after a few moments, we hear the clack of high heels as she walks back towards are room.

"Hey, who has the biggest ears?" the receptionist asks.

"WHAT?"

"I've got this guy on the phone --" she begins.

One particularly insane dominatrix cuts her off. "I'll do it, I'll do it, what does he want?"

"Well, he wants to ride on your back and pull on your ears while you make donkey noises."

We all gape.

"You mean braying?" the girls asks.

"I guess," the receptionist says.

The dominatrix starts braying in this huge, honking, convulsing sort of way. We all die with laughter as the receptionist clatters away.

We spend the next three hours praying the client comes in, just for the sheer what-the-fuckery of it.

He never does.

Comments

[sinonmybody.livejournal.com]

hahaha Sometimes I miss being a domme just for the sheer insanity stories I'd get. :) Thanks for sharing this one.

[shay-writes.livejournal.com]

Great story!

[kaffy_r]

*snort* Life can be such insanely outrageous art, neh?

[cozzene.livejournal.com]

Almost couldn't breathe while reading that.

[berry-k.livejournal.com]

Wow. I've heard of "Pony Girls" and "Donkey shows" but ... this is a new one!

[51stcenturyfox.livejournal.com]

OMG! He was afraid to come in... since he'd made an ass of himself? :D

(He probably had a formative trip down to the bottom of the Grand Canyon on a mule as a kid or something.)

[rm.livejournal.com]

OMG, we never, ever thought of that. You're probably right!

Kid: I'm scared of the doneky
Parents: It's just like when mommy used to carry you piggy back when you were little.

People are so frigging creepy.

[51stcenturyfox.livejournal.com]

No kidding!

I'm always interested in why people form very specific kinks like this. There has to be some reason. He liked... Eeyore or something.

I think my childhood just broke. Again.

[kshandra]

There used to be an adult magazine called Nugget (it may still be out there, somewhere, though I have yet to find an online presence for it) that catered to fetishes. It started with the common stuff (femdom, crossdressing), expanded into the realm where Penthouse dare not tread (adult-baby, amputeeism), and went on and on...but the amazing part of the magazine was their personal ad section.

gridlore and I picked up a copy one day, and there was an ad from someone who had a slapstick fetish. (He wanted the girl of his dreams to throw pies at him, IIRC.) I both do and do NOT want to know how this developed....

[laughingacademy.livejournal.com]

Did she have to wear big shoes while she was flinging pastry?

[savorie.livejournal.com]

A friend back in Orlando has that, um, predilection. One of my first questions was whether he was alone in it, and he thought he was until the Internet came along.

[stardragonca.livejournal.com]

Our neighbors have donkeys. No human can make that sound.
(My face doesn't want to be straight just now, but I insist...BWA! *fail*)

[coriander.livejournal.com]

Oh my!

[jo02]

*snort*
You make my middle-aged, suburban life feel mega-whatever the opposite of totally awesome is -
Please don't ever stop posting.

[madtheo.livejournal.com]

May I just say, while you don't know me and I don't know you, I still love reading your many, many posts even if I don't know who you're talking about half most of the time. I am constantly entertained, educated and fascinated by your exploits and by your media search results.

It just had to be said.

[sykii.livejournal.com]

I always thought that he specifically saw an ad for G.
I never tire of this story.

[bodlon.livejournal.com]

Five dollars says that this guy has a phone call related kink, because I could swear I've heard a similar story from at least one other source. Which, while frustrating fiscally for the dominants involved (and the people who answer their phones), amuses me just a little.

Because, really? That's just damned bizarre.