sundries

[rm]

As some people noticed, cleolinda linked the other day to my piece about the fetishization and diserespect towards both gay people and gay characters in fandom. This happened in the midst of the CoE craziness (which had its relevance, surely, especially in light of the line from the original post that was used for the link -- that was sort of great, I was rather proud of that quip), and I hadn't gotten around to mentioning that I was glad more people saw the piece, but also disturbed by some of the derailing that showed up with the new influx of readers ("you're too sensitive"). Today, one of the posters who wanted to bring up the issues I raised at a con panel reported back on the results, which were disheartening to say the least. Don't yell at her, as her panel audience is not her fault, but I wanted to underline how real the problem is thanks to her reportage.

Meanwhile, there was a post about LGBT discomfort with content in Torchwood: Children of Earth, which I seriously disagreed with here. My comment is on page 2. Obviously the whole thing contains epic spoilers. The original commenter has, what I feel, is a reasonable point of view I disagreed with. However, some of the comments are illuminating as regards the paragraph previous to this, as they are filled with random examples of misogyny and more than a few straight women informing us they were only there for the queer and they feel betrayed.

*Sigh* I feel... very defeated.

Meanwhile laurab1 links us to a gay soldier's story because of whatever homophobic idiocy she's encountered in fandom this week (not sure what it was, but that was the set up of her choosing to link).

In response to all the fuckery going on in the over-the-top and art-negative and sincerely just human rudeness fail-y reactions to CoE (hate it if you want, but don't harass or threaten writers) blackbird_song had a bit of chat with James Moran and has organized a little charity drive benefiting Children in Need and Cancer Research UK. If you've got a few extra bucks and want to say "no, this behavior was not okay," you can do both at once. Particular kudos for her, because of the way her own opinion on the CoE material and reactions evolved and for doing something constructive. Details and the vaguest of spoilers are here.

This piece by extrafancyganza is the greatest piece of Torchwood fan art ever. Rec'ed by xtricks and entirely SFW and spoiler-free.

Things I don't need: people's shitty ex-husbands friending me on Facebook.

Things I also don't need: residual virus drama on office computer that makes me hesitant to do things I need to do involving online banking and travel arrangements; I think I'll wait 'til I get home.

Comments

[pantryslut.livejournal.com]

"you can write about murderers and still condemn them"?

Yes, but if you lovingly describe their murders with a positive glow and then condemn them (and yes, I know this happens quite often actually, serial killer genre I am looking at you), I reserve the right to be extremely creeped out at the very least.

[woogledesigns.livejournal.com]

*Sigh* I feel... very defeated.
Please don't give up. You're one of the good guys.

[brewsternorth.livejournal.com]

Things I don't need: people's shitty ex-husbands friending me on Facebook.

Yikes! Call me a techno-hermit, but things like this are why I still do not have a FB account (whatever the temptations).

LOL at Ianto Jones: Action Hero. (He totally is.)

[blackbird-song.livejournal.com]

Thank you so much for mentioning the charity drive. It is much appreciated, and has already resulted in a donation.

My views on CoE are still evolving and I've lots more to say about fan action and reaction. My emotions are still getting in the way too much for me to be cogent or even true to myself on artistic critique of the episode itself, but at least I can speak more coherently on what might and might not be productive interaction.

I shall read your piece on fetishization when I can, which might not be until a few days later, when I'm a bit better able to deal with the challenge to my psyche. I desperately don't want to fetishize, but worry (without having done any proper homework yet) that I get so caught up in the love of exploring a given relationship between a set of characters that it might be a danger. In the meantime, though, I'm very sorry that you are experiencing the derailment you report. It's an important issue, and deserves serious consideration. FWIW, I don't want to see you defeated on this.

Catherine

[rm.livejournal.com]

Well the fetishization thing was here int his journal before CoE aired, so you might have already seen it.

What's so amazing to me, and frustrating, is it's so easy not to fetishize. Treat gay relationships like any other relationship, the end. You do a perfectly fine job -- I've never blinked at anything in your writing that way.

Of course, what I am perhaps not getting is that some of the fetishization comes out of extremes of heteronormativity in people's own lives, and as such the gay cliches they write don't pop out at them anymore than the heterosexual cliches in their own lives. This disturbs me, but is something I have to recognize I can't see well, as so much of my life has been about opting the fuck out of that: I'm bisexual and I have a lot of privilege as a thin, attractive woman. It would be very easy for me to have a life all about the rules. I tried it and I was bored.

P.S., I'll be donating to both charities tonight when I'm on a more trusted machine.

[rm.livejournal.com]

Thanks, and I'm not. It's just sometimes I think I'm preaching to the choir and there's just a small handful of problem people that just need to be educated and then it will all be fine. And then I realize, no, lots and lots and lots and lots of people really don't get it and don't want to.

[woogledesigns.livejournal.com]

I had the same feelings about feminism and queer identity awareness a couple of weeks back, but people talked me around. It feels like a loosing battle. But so long as you keep living your life as best you can figure to be right, keep putting the message out there you're a force in the right direction, change is long coming and hard won. If we can only educate, inform or liberate one person in 500, that's still one in 500 more than would be reached otherwise.

This perked me up a little http://www.thefword.org.uk/blog/2009/07/new_feature_con_1

And the choir turn up because they like to hear you preach, and they like to sing along and sometimes make up their own songs, too.

[tsarina.livejournal.com]

Oh god, not my previous husband I hope. (I have no idea if he's in jail, in prison or back out. Though I did have the unsettling realization the other day that the apartment complex I last knew him to be living at is a mile down the road from me. He can't still be there, can he? God I hope not.

[rm.livejournal.com]

He's not in jail. I got the friends request last night. I have to assume he just joined FB for the first time and it pulled everyone he had ever emailed from his account and he's not actually trying to fuck with us.

[tsarina.livejournal.com]

Oh my fucking god.

[liminalia.livejournal.com]

You don't have to accept anyone's requests, and there's a reasonable amount of privacy control there, like LJ.

[liminalia.livejournal.com]

Mmm, FB only sends friend requests if you tell it to. He had to opt in. It will "suggest", but you still have to click.

[rm.livejournal.com]

Fucker fucker fucker.

*sigh*

I barely use Facebook, so I really don't care, but this dude's shenanigans are high on the Do Not Want list.

[liminalia.livejournal.com]

I know how it is. I dropped all my relatives on FB after some homophobic drama last week. I loves my LJ, I do.

[sethg]

I'm suddenly reminded of something I read in a book on sketching: if you're just starting to learn how to draw, your first big hurdle is drawing what you actually see. Even when you have a model right in front of you, your preconceptions about what things "ought to" look like, and the fact that you're used to paying more attention to some features of the body than others, prevent you from drawing things in the proper location and proportion.

A fortiori, if your most salient knowledge of gay relationships comes from third-hand misinformation originating from The 700 Club and equally well-informed sources, and then you try to write fiction with gay characters, then in order to not-fetishize, you have to make a similar mental effort to re-calibrate your perceptions.

[timelady.livejournal.com]

I saw pete_wisdom did a post earlier today commenting on one of your previous posts on the presence of LGBT in fandom. I was in awe that he even knew you since I know you two from completely different places (I used to write DW fan fics with him in a group years ago).

[stardragonca.livejournal.com]

No, you really are one of the good guys!

[rm.livejournal.com]

I meant not giving up.

The rest of it... well, doesn't matter either way, just gotta do it, you know?

[stardragonca.livejournal.com]

Yes, I do.
Happy Bastille Day to you and yours, my friend!

Things you don't need...

[abnormal-apathy.livejournal.com]

Tell me about it. My friends have been receiving friends requests from Yoshi lately. UGH!!!!!!!!!!

[copperwise.livejournal.com]

I stay out of fandom stuff, but I read the post and your response.

I found the portrayal of the relationship poignant and lovely. I like that gay characters in the Who and Torchwood universe are just *there* and fairly normalized. I found Clem's reaction and Ianto's family reactions to be completely realistic given their backgrounds.

AND we DO know what happens to Jack in the future, he does become a lonely god, and showing the tragedies of his life and choices was necessary. We know he ends up alone and finally dies. Seeing his life play out and knowing what he becomes is sad and painful and extremely well done.

[neifile7.livejournal.com]

More WTFery, but also some great, needed links -- thanks for both. I was grateful to read blackbird's, have something constructive to do, and I gained a new friend from it.

I've a stage two CoE reaction post I hope you can read sometime, but I know exhaustion sets in at a certain point.

*inoculates you against computer and fannish viruses*

[rm.livejournal.com]

I think, for me, exhaustion has set it, although when it's People I Like, I do want to get to it all eventually.

Because I largely loved CoE (despite some serious structural complaints that aren't the things people are by and large up in arms about), and because I actually emailed Kali in response to a fic snippet she sent me, "God, it's so great to hear Ianto's voice again" I just need to -- it's not do other things so much, but I need to sit with this myself a bit, because doing the talking to the Internet thing is thrashing me. Also, welcome to crazytown, population: me.

Also, Patty and I are going away this weekend, so I've less time to do frivolous stuff with a frivolous weekend coming up.

But I will get there. And I'm trying to finish fic tonight!

Battle Butler

[stardragonca.livejournal.com]

That is the greatest piece of Torchwood fan art ever!

I need a ginormous poster of that and an understanding wall.
God wants me to have it.

Oh dear God

[laughingacademy.livejournal.com]

Apparently some Twilight fans are pushing for Tom Felton to be cast in the third(?) movie, Eclipse.

[eumelia.livejournal.com]

I wrote a meta/review about the "Queer", somewhat because of that post, which I didn't comment on, because I didn't trust myself to be able to convey my thoughts succintly enough.

If you're interested: http://eumelia.livejournal.com/416621.html

[rm.livejournal.com]

Thank you for linking to that! Yes! So awesome, and I totally agree.

Also, am glad I'm not crazy for seeing that lambda thing -- you can't do that by accident!

Someone found a dated newspaper in a still in CoE, which makes Day 2 September 9. Which makes the day Ianto dies September 11. I'm trying to figure out what to do with that -- especially since Jack, as Face of Boe saves New New New (x37) New York at the end of his life.