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[rm]

By now, even with her brother's speed and efficiency, Patty should be safely on her way to Ohio. It's just for a couple of weeks to see everyone, but I've gotten particularly used to having her around.

For the many new people who may not know, Patty's an archaeologist, which means she generally spends 8 - 12 weeks a year (all in one burst) somewhere isolated and remote. By isolated and remote I mean no Internet, no phone, sometimes no address. She's been places where I couldn't mail her letters and places that read her letters before they go to me. So that can be tough. Considering that she left on one of these digs three weeks after we first started dating, I am more or less used to them, however.

That said, I've been spoiled lately. After a very small gap (a couple of months) between trips to Syria (where they read our letters) and Oman (where she had no address and got pneumonia), Patty's been home for more than a year (a few visits to her family aside). We'd thought she be away this summer, but once it became clear she'd be in Cardiff their academic calendar has meant she's more or less home until late September this year. And Cardiff is civilization -- phones and email and letters and packages and everything. And I'll be able to visit and she should be able to meet me over in Europe when I'm on a business trip in the fall too. So in the scheme of things, that's going to be easy, even if the gap between this trip and the next one (India) probably won't be more than a month (and that's optimism, I know).

Even so, I miss her and Patty worries (I always cry at the airport when she goes off on her long trips) because I certainly feel like sometimes I can be pretty dysfunctional. Also, she likes me. Right now, though, I need to be focused on finishing work that must be done before the Bristol trip and the Bristol trip itself.

My plan is to make all the annoying calls this weekend: my bank, my mobile company and print out all my itineraries and reservations/receipts, so I'm not making myself last-minute panicked on Wednesday (I leave directly from my office that night). I also need to prepare my response paper for the article I'm paired with, and it probably wouldn't hurt for me to figure out where my brain is about the whole of my own research which has been a strange thing to live with over the last several months.

As for the event itself, I'm excited. Full stop. But the coinciding of the trip with the one year anniversary of a fictional fact central to the paper's theme is bizarre to me, and since nothing about this work is about my uninvolvement with its subject, I keep waiting to be hit with something other than the rather extreme compartmentalization and sense of having a damn job to do that I have about it right now. Not that that isn't fitting. It's fucking fitting.

My trip is, for now, as planned as it's going to get (and perhaps as planned as it is possible to get), and although I may really find myself regretting going to the Imperial War Museum when I've been on a plane all night and am high strung and have probably slept dubiously, that's what makes the most sense in my schedule right now. Knowing myself, and my history of solo travel, it's also perfectly clear to me that I am trying to make this hard, because I find solace in that.

Right now, my only real quandry is whether to take the small suitcase that will make the constant moving around on this trip easier, or the giant suitcase, so I can fill it with gluten-free bakewell tarts on the flight back.

Comments

[quaintheart.livejournal.com]

Despite the fact that the GIANT suitcase will be a pain the whole trip... it still gets my vote! On top of gluten-free bakewell tarts, you never know what else you might fall in love with while you are there!

[laughingacademy.livejournal.com]

Can you put the small suitcase in the big suitcase for the flight, stash the big bag somewhere on arrival, use the small bag for intra-trip schlepping, and then load up the big bag with goodies right before you leave?

[brightlotusmoon.livejournal.com]

I sympathize and empathize. When Adam and I were dating, he began working at a computer rental company that would send him on out of state jobs for days at a time. As the years passed, the company grew national and then international. When Adam and I got married in 2005, he had already been to several other countries and 41 states. He may be gone for two or three weeks at a time.
Sometimes I get a little tired of people asking "How do you maintain your sanity when your significant other is gone for so long?" because all my answers seem trivial.

[chris-walsh.livejournal.com]

Sometimes I get a little tired of people asking "How do you maintain your sanity when your significant other is gone for so long?" because all my answers seem trivial.

You should tell them "Masturbation. Furious masturbation." THEN they'd stop asking. :-)

Seriously, good on you and him for making it work.

[brightlotusmoon.livejournal.com]

LOL! I should.

[chris-walsh.livejournal.com]

*grins* Glad you laughed.

TMI can often shut people up. A married couple I knew would get mistaken for sister and brother. Eventually when someone would ask if they were siblings, they'd say "Yes!" and then enthusiastically start making out. Yeah, THAT shut people up.

[brightlotusmoon.livejournal.com]

HAH! I love it. Adam and I tend to make people blush.
Since I'm just under five feet and look very young for my age, Adam will sometimes get asked if he's dating a teenager. His answers have made people gasp out loud.

[rm.livejournal.com]

Overall, I actually find it to be good for our relationship. We don't get sick of each other, we value the uninterrupted time we have, we get to grow as separate people, we have new stuff to bring to the conversation. But none of that stops it from being hard when she's away.

[brightlotusmoon.livejournal.com]

Yes. Exactly. This is usually how I reply to people. A lot of them still don't get it.

[affreca.livejournal.com]

That's how it works for my mom and archeologist dad. He most does survey work in the northern great plains and his schedule is usually some variation of 10 working and 4 off while there's no snow. They start getting twitchy with each other if the start of the season gets to late.

It certainly gave me an odd point of view during the end of deployment briefings when I was in the Navy.

[penguineggs.livejournal.com]

There is no institution in the UK that I have ever come across who are better at dealing with "highly strung" than the Imperial War Museum. After all, they are a museum whose SOPs have to contemplate dealing with people who come up to their exhibits and go, "Oh, my god! My father/mother/SO/brother/sister/wife died in that" on a relatively regular basis.

I'm not saying it won't be difficult, but I find it a curiously protective museum.

[rm.livejournal.com]

That's pretty cool. I tend to be really emotional, but also totally fine at taking care of myself in that state, but the lack of sleep/plane travel unhinges me factor means I've the sense to not know how that day is going to go.

[austengirl.livejournal.com]

I will say I found the Manchester branch of the Imperial War Museum absolutely worth visiting. Emotionally draining and occasionally difficult, yes. If the museum itself is too overwhelming, I will say the shop has a very good range of 40's reproductions. I didn't see any Spitfire cufflinks, but I wouldn't be surprised if they carry something along those lines.

And I remember the days of long-distance relationshipping, but we had phone and/or internet conversations most days. Just out of curiosity, is Patty affiliated with a university or museum? No need to name it, I just wondered since it sounded like she was going to Cardiff in an academic context.

[rm.livejournal.com]

She's getting her PhD now in the city and there's someone with a particular expertise she needs to learn in Cardiff. No way for me to make that sound less absurd thanks to my fandom.

[austengirl.livejournal.com]

No worries, from what little I know of archaeology it seemed like there's usually an institutional frame work for digs and such.

And yeah, Cardiff...you really can't make this stuff up.

[soukup.livejournal.com]

I wince every time I read about your celiac-related troubles. I have several friends who frequently bake with gluten-free flours (rice flour, etc) and feel comfortable using them, and I'm sure I could get one of them to rec a good gluten-free cookbook (or website or whatever) if I asked their advice. Would you like me to do a little research on your behalf and come up with some decent how-to resources for you to check out? Just because I'm sure your life would be a lot simpler if you could feed yourself instead of going on a wild goose chase every time you get hungry!

[graene.livejournal.com]

If the small suitcase is sturdy enough to check, I would vote for that with a collapsible tote/duffel that can be carried on packed full of goodies on the way home. But I haven't had to deal with this kind of travel since 2001, so carry-on regs may not make that feasible anymore.

Have fun!

[rm.livejournal.com]

Not an option. I get one carry-on and one checked back. My carryon is the laptop.

[weirdquark]

What about putting your laptop in something small enough to still use as a carry-on and big enough to use to take home goodies?

I don't know how strict the airlines are that you'll be using, but I've had to gate check a bag that I used as a carry-on for some of my earlier flights but the later ones deemed too big -- I removed my laptop and a few other things I didn't want to check, sent the bag through, and they didn't charge me for checking it.

[graene.livejournal.com]

Damn. Still, good for me to know if my mom succeeds in getting us on a plane anytime soon.

There's always shipping clothes home option - wouldn't want the tarts to get stale.

[rm.livejournal.com]

This is only for international flights. Domestic flights still allow two carry-ons on most carriers.

[graene.livejournal.com]

Rumor from new BIL's family is that Disney now runs cruises in the Black Sea, so actually pretty relevant. I think mom thinks I'm researching it, so probably not this year, but best choice on the table.

[graene.livejournal.com]

Er, Baltic Sea. Anyway...doing research now, although by next summer Turbo will be old enough the issues from last time shouldn't be relevant.

[supertailz.livejournal.com]

I KNOW THE ANSWER! PICK ME! PICK ME! *handwavies*

Ok, so the last couple times I was back home (UK) what I did was:

GET ANOTHER SUITCASE.

The first time I just stole one of my dad's. The second time I actually caved and bought one. It was SO WORTH IT. Handluggage on the way there and ALL THE SKIPS AND SWEETS IN THE WORLD on the way back.

...also possibly I'm tired and overcapitalising currently. But YAY ENGLAND. HI HOME.

[rm.livejournal.com]

Hrmm. On one hand, we really don't need more suitcases. On the other hand, considering the amount of traveling we do....

[bugeyedmonster.livejournal.com]

I don't know about sweets... but when my mom was still in the habit of going down to Corpus Christi every year, she always took a small carryon and shipped her clothes to her sister. Then when she left, her sister would ship her clothes back.

Of course, you're doing an international flight, not a domestic one. I'm not sure how shipping your clothes back would go.

Oh, if you like frozen mac&cheese, Amy's Kitchen has a gluten free version. They make an excellent frozen regular mac&cheese. Really, it's the best I've tasted. Their soy cheese one is not too bad, it just that soy doesn't have the same texture as milk cheese.