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May. 21st, 2003 03:36 pmVolunteered at the yoga center again today. Will actually have the time to start classes tomorrow. I like it there, and the people there.
I learned something about myself recently -- or rather, just had a well known fact resolidified in my mind yet again. It's not a bad thing, although it frustrates me to pieces. Which is that I tend to respond very strongly to certain types of energy (for lack of a less silly word) in certain types of people -- both when actually in my life and when just out there for consumption (that is to say, that which entertains me and/or is of artistic interest).
I've been hit with two versions of that in as many days -- the first was merely amusing, the second, while more interesting, is also less amusing to me. The problem, fundamentally, when I get into the path of that sort of energy is that it's very easy for me to get off my own focus. Very easy for me to be distracted, and to bend in ways that serve the moment and at best, nothing else. At worst, my flexibility, for lack of a less kind word, is notorious for cooking up big messes in my life and other's.
Wow, this is mindblowingly nonspecific. Let us just say that a certain sort of crazy creative genius, coupled with a somewhat wandering interest in spirituality, an inclination to hard work and a decent amount of charisma, will forever and always inspire me to many things -- unfortunately, chief among them is acting like a poorly-socialized fifteen-year-old girl. And while amusing, and it is, really, I do laugh at myself -- it's a weakness and a meekness that is profoundly counter to the fact that "no fear" is like a basic requirement of doing pretty much anything I want to be doing.
So yeah.
In other news, I am baking minimuffins! Yes, right now!
Also, just saw the SNL where Sinead sings a capella and rips up the picture of the pope. They edited out the pope part, but the song was still there. I remember seeing this one live when it happened, with my parents, and I remember it being this weird shocking moment -- musically, not just the pope thing.
Watching it today it was just as eerie, most especially with the fact now that I could see she was terrified, and with everything going on in the world and she's singing about war.
Strange thing. Her voice can almost always move me to tears. And while the stuff she's on about can really annoy me, and I wish she weren't so crazy that her work is less powerful to most people -- her first album -- my god -- we had never heard anything like it and really haven't since. Such a weird powerful thing, from another place. And I love her other stuff, but when she got production values, the terror went missing.
I learned something about myself recently -- or rather, just had a well known fact resolidified in my mind yet again. It's not a bad thing, although it frustrates me to pieces. Which is that I tend to respond very strongly to certain types of energy (for lack of a less silly word) in certain types of people -- both when actually in my life and when just out there for consumption (that is to say, that which entertains me and/or is of artistic interest).
I've been hit with two versions of that in as many days -- the first was merely amusing, the second, while more interesting, is also less amusing to me. The problem, fundamentally, when I get into the path of that sort of energy is that it's very easy for me to get off my own focus. Very easy for me to be distracted, and to bend in ways that serve the moment and at best, nothing else. At worst, my flexibility, for lack of a less kind word, is notorious for cooking up big messes in my life and other's.
Wow, this is mindblowingly nonspecific. Let us just say that a certain sort of crazy creative genius, coupled with a somewhat wandering interest in spirituality, an inclination to hard work and a decent amount of charisma, will forever and always inspire me to many things -- unfortunately, chief among them is acting like a poorly-socialized fifteen-year-old girl. And while amusing, and it is, really, I do laugh at myself -- it's a weakness and a meekness that is profoundly counter to the fact that "no fear" is like a basic requirement of doing pretty much anything I want to be doing.
So yeah.
In other news, I am baking minimuffins! Yes, right now!
Also, just saw the SNL where Sinead sings a capella and rips up the picture of the pope. They edited out the pope part, but the song was still there. I remember seeing this one live when it happened, with my parents, and I remember it being this weird shocking moment -- musically, not just the pope thing.
Watching it today it was just as eerie, most especially with the fact now that I could see she was terrified, and with everything going on in the world and she's singing about war.
Strange thing. Her voice can almost always move me to tears. And while the stuff she's on about can really annoy me, and I wish she weren't so crazy that her work is less powerful to most people -- her first album -- my god -- we had never heard anything like it and really haven't since. Such a weird powerful thing, from another place. And I love her other stuff, but when she got production values, the terror went missing.
