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I really should stop being surprised.
Basically, if you visit the Grand Canyon and ask how old it is, they won't tell you, because they don't want to offend Creationists.
I really should stop being surprised.
Basically, if you visit the Grand Canyon and ask how old it is, they won't tell you, because they don't want to offend Creationists.
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Date: 2007-01-03 03:09 am (UTC)As I commented in
"Fundamentalist Christianity. Fascinating. These people actually believe the world is 12 thousand years old. Swear to God! Based on what? I asked them.
"Well, we looked at all the people in the Bible, and we added them up all the way back to Adam and Eve, their ages – 12 thousand years."
"Well, how fucking scientific! Okay. I didn't know that you'd gone to so much trouble there. That's good"
"You believe the world's 12 thousand years old?"
"That's right."
"Okay, I got one question to ask you. A one word question. Ready?"
"Uh-uh."
"Dinosaurs"
You know, the world's 12 thousand years old and dinosaurs existed, and they existed in that time … you'd think it would have been mentioned in the fucking Bible at some point. "And lo, Jesus and the disciples walked to Nazareth. But the trail was blocked by a giant brontosaurus … with a splinter in his paw. And O, the disciples did run a-shrieking: 'What a big fucking lizard, Lord!' But Jesus was unafraid, and he took the splinter from the brontosaurus's paw, and the big lizard became his friend. And Jesus sent him to Scotland where he lived in a loch for O, so many years, inviting thousands of American tourists to bring their fat fucking families and their fat dollar bills. And O, Scotland did praise the Lord: 'Thank you, Lord. Thank you, Lord. Thank you, Lord.'"
"Dinosaur fossils?"
"God put those there to test our faith."
"Thank God I'm strapped in right now here man. I think God put you here to test my faith, Dude. You believe that?"
"Uh huh."
"Does that trouble anyone here? The idea that God.. might be... fuckin' with our heads? I have trouble sleeping with that knowledge. Some prankster God running around: "Hu hu ho. We will see who believes in me now, ha HA."
--The Late Great Bill Hicks