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Date: 2010-08-30 01:56 pm (UTC)I also used "sir" and "ma'am" while I worked at the library with faculty/old people who looked like they might die and give the university money imminently. They seemed to appreciate it.
When I was eight, I had to explain to my dad that "ma'am" was not spelled "mam." That was awkward.
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Date: 2010-08-30 07:24 pm (UTC)(no subject)
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Date: 2010-08-30 02:18 pm (UTC)Where I live ma'am is basically obligatory! But I enjoy the common variant, "miss lady", a lot more.
I don't like Plato's approach to human nature or to art. It's just weird and anti-human. Aristotle, on the other hand, had some amazing insights about art that are so simple but profound that people keep discovering them over and over again... even really not-obvious stuff, like an answer to the question of why audiences like torture porn movies.
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Date: 2010-08-30 02:22 pm (UTC)Re: Faux Irish pub
Date: 2010-08-30 02:24 pm (UTC)Red facade?
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Date: 2010-08-30 02:29 pm (UTC)Time for annual wi(ad)thdraw(er)al -- thank goodness for D*C!
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Date: 2010-08-30 02:29 pm (UTC)Roslin was often referred to as "Madam President," but she was just as often told, "Yes, sir."
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Date: 2010-08-30 02:30 pm (UTC)(no subject)
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Date: 2010-08-30 02:30 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2010-08-30 02:48 pm (UTC)And am I getting a skewed perspective or do you have the worst possible luck when travelling? Maybe alerts should be sent on ahead "Rachelline has entered the transport network... gods have mercy on us all"
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Date: 2010-08-30 02:50 pm (UTC)(no subject)
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Date: 2010-08-30 03:08 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2010-08-30 03:17 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2010-08-30 03:17 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2010-08-30 03:34 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2010-08-30 03:35 pm (UTC)(no subject)
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Date: 2010-08-30 08:06 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2010-08-30 03:48 pm (UTC)But now that I live in India? Wow. I am Ma'am'ed and Madam'ed 100 times a day. It is definitely a class thing here and not about age. My housekeeper is older than I am, a grandmother and she calls me Madam and I still cringe every time. She also makes sure other servants and workers and visitors to my house address me as Madam. The first nanny once called me Ma'am, but there was a definite note of sarcasm to it. The housekeeper came flying out of the kitchen, literally hissing and words flew (not English words so I wasn't exactly following along). The nanny was more respectful to my face after that, but there were other problems so she doesn't work here any more.
I don't think I will ever get used to it. And that the woman who is older, wiser, more experienced at life than I am, and can manage my life way better than I ever have - calls me Madam, make me cringe every time. I call her by her first name. Whenever she says Madam, I have to control my reaction because it makes me really uncomfortable. And whenever I address her, I have to kind of work up to it. She believes (as most do here, I think) that the difference is required for her to do her job well. She doesn't take crap from anybody. She's tough and smart. But, as she explained it to me (because I am unable to not ask, this is probably a character flaw), "Nobody is the boss of me. Not even my husband. I am always taking care of everyone since I was a little girl. But when I come to work, you are the Madam and I am the maid. When the Madam says, "Theresa, do this", then I do it. I work for you, no one else. For you, I do, because you are the Madam".
So I guess it helps her organize relationships? I don't know. It's all so confusing. All i know is, I'm uncomfortable being called Madam / Ma'am. I have a perfectly good name. It's Billi-Jean. And everyone is free to use it.
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Date: 2010-08-30 06:28 pm (UTC)(no subject)
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Date: 2010-08-30 03:59 pm (UTC)Once, when I was about nine, i was getting royal shit from mom. In my face, finger wagging and everything. I forget what it was about, but she was seriously pissed. I kept my eyes on the floor and my mouth shut. Then she asked (yelled) if I understood.
I knew from hours I spent reading every day and from watching 'Little House on the Prairie' that the correct response was "Yes, Ma'am", so that's what I said.
WHAT did you say?
Still looking at the floor, I replied, I said, 'Yes, Ma'am".
She hit me so hard I skidded across the floor and up against my bed. My face, where she'd hit me, hurt for days. And I was SO confused. I really didn't get it. By the time I looked up, she was gone.
It was never mentioned again. I think now that it wasn't that "Ma'am" was essentially a bad thing, but that, given her background, it could only be assumed to be said in sarcasm, that I was mocking her, which of course, she wasn't going to stand for lol
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Date: 2010-08-30 11:27 pm (UTC)(no subject)
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Date: 2010-08-30 04:43 pm (UTC)One of them is rather misanthropic and full of rage, but he's a sweetheart all the same. His husband is quiet and completely content with life. They don't give a shit what people think of them. They've been together for almost eight years. I'm still wrapping my head around why people doubt their existence. I mean, I can prove it. I have saved chats of our conversations about their older cat who is dying of cancer. They love animals more than they love people, too.
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Date: 2010-08-30 04:49 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2010-08-30 07:24 pm (UTC)If one knows the other person's name and title that seems preferable to use (Senator Boxer, Dr. Someprofessor, Ms. Whatsit), but in the absence of such knowledge what are we left with-- "Hey you?" It's unfortunate that we don't have an equivalent of "Ms." for these situations.
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Date: 2010-08-30 11:47 pm (UTC)In my cultural experience, too. I tutor, and when one of my students' parents is a doctor, etc., I try to use their title appropriately unless they specifically tell me just to use their first name. After all, they worked pretty damn hard for whatever is it, often.
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Date: 2010-08-30 08:21 pm (UTC)I'm not sure about that. The problem, as usual, is the center, which is all mixed up and like WELL I LIKE WATCHING QUEER EYE LOLOLOL but also GAYS MIGHT HARM THE CHILDREN. The center doesn't care about political philosophies like "equal protection under the law."
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Date: 2010-08-30 08:22 pm (UTC)(no subject)
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