grrrrrrrrr

[rm]

Read this: http://www.livejournal.com/users/karnythia/416490.html -- in which the government informs us, among other things, that no one likes a smart girl.

Seethe.

Take my poll. (Btw, LJ polls drive me crazy, because I want to do a lot of "if, then, skip to" etc., but I can't. So these things aren't just unscientific, but sloppy. But doing it made me feel better. I apologize if I left out the answer you wanted, I try really hard to be inclusive in these things, but live and learn, also, hi, at work and distracted.).


[Poll #632346]

Comments

[abnormal-apathy.livejournal.com]

When you ask for the "needs of women" do you mean MY needs or what I think MOST women are looking for?

[rm.livejournal.com]

what most women are looking for.... If I knew how to edit polls (although I don't think I can), I would to clarify. Just... argh, that link! Argh!

[schmidtybooger.livejournal.com]

For the last question there was no, "I am alone." choice, which is why I didn't fill it out.
And that link? SEETHE.

[rm.livejournal.com]

Yeah, I was trying to differentiate between being single, which wasn't data I was trying to pick up, and people who just really don't want to be with people (hence that disgusting little "lifestyle choice" phrase). LJ polls are the worst in terms of science and including everyone.

[zarq.livejournal.com]

I didn't check Sexual Fulfillment, Physical Attractiveness and Recreational Companionship because I wanted to keep it to 5 checked boxes. But I do think they're important in any relationship. In my humble opinion, honest, open communication is the most important of any others you have listed.

Obviously, gender roles are in the eye of the beholder and each person's needs change from relationship to relationship.

[drfardook.livejournal.com]

My usual technique at lessening the impact upon reading these sorts of things is to make a sarcastic, cynical joke so I don't get upset about it. Its a way of keeping a little emotional distance from things that I can't necessarily do anything about or things that already happened and are too late to do anything about.

Increasingly I've found that everything that the administration does goes way beyond my ability to think of a quip that will make me able to continue digesting my food in a comfortable fashion.

Its not so much the options that bother me right now as the undertone of Men Must Do These Things and Women Must Do These Things.

And the only alternative to this is Will and Grace?

[rm.livejournal.com]

Will and Grace drives me nuts. It's like, the "single woman with cats" cliche turned into "single woman with gays".

[rm.livejournal.com]

I'm just fascinated to see some of the broad trends that are emerging -- men apparently don't need conversation so much, but they do need their partners to be hot. Us girls, we'll take any old dude as long as he can talk... although I should be surprised. Not attractive smart dudes are a cliched lust object for women (explain House any other way), and the answering cliche for men is the librarian in the porn movie?

*sigh*

I despair for us all.

[orien.livejournal.com]

My "typical of my gender" needs are based entirely on what I consider gender-based needs as outlined in my answer to the prior question.

Also - it was good of you to put ticky boxes on the last question.

[zarq.livejournal.com]

*grumble* I didn't follow instructions. Completed the poll and made my post without reading the link.

What morons. In the last three decades the definitions of families, relationships, marriage and gender roles have (properly!) blurred so drastically that it's pure idiocy to try and shove such narrow-mindedness down children's throats and treat it as gospel. What happens when they find out the real world isn't as black and white as they were led to believe? Why teach such ridiculous meanings of right or wrong when they no longer apply to modern society? Why encourage intolerance? Why encourage mindless gender roles? (Woman is smart, but should remain demure and helpless to make man feel strong and accomplished.) If a guy's ego is so fragile that he can't deal with a woman offering him helpful advice, then he shouldn't be procreating.

Of course, encouraging abstinence instead of education is a fool's errand to begin with, so I guess I shouldn't expect otherwise. Fuckwits.

[abnormal-apathy.livejournal.com]

LOL.

Okay, I gave my answers. I may be biased, though. I tend to think more like a guy than a girl on most issues.

For me, personally, the top five of the list you provided are Conversation, Recreational Companionship, Sexual Fulfillment, Affection, Honesty and Openness.

[isiscolo.livejournal.com]

I believe the five major needs of HUMAN BEINGS...depend on the individual human being. (And I suspect most of us do!)

The linked article made me grrr.

[lawnrrd]

You forgot the "I have no fucking idea" checkboxes.

[schmidtybooger.livejournal.com]

Plus, they're bitches to edit. Fucking polls. Always ruining it for the rest of us.

[hangedwoman.livejournal.com]

I suspect it might be best if I came back and commented on this after I have procured cigarettes for myself.

Because - argh. No. If I say anything now there will only be unnecessary pissiness.

[rm.livejournal.com]

But we're all in the unnecessary pissiness together!

[hangedwoman.livejournal.com]

Er, not necessarily. My pissiness has a bit to do with how even though this poll was written as a reaction to the material, in many ways it is a direct reflection of the material, but unacknowledged. You were OK with not differentiating from the original material in saying that the only needs that matter are the needs that can be met within the context of a relationship. Which seems to be reinforced by the way you phrased the last question - you only want the input of those who have succesfully found a relationship or those who didn't fail because they were never trying.

And for that matter, do you really believe most people are that self-aware, to truly understand what their needs are?

I just *flaps hands distractedly*, I get frustrated when I see what looks like a badly formed reaction to things like this. And nicotine withdrawl, not making it better.

[saltbox.livejournal.com]

Hmm, I'm breaking the rules of your poll and just listing my five major needs and noting that I happen to be a woman: conversation, recreational companionship, physical attractiveness, sexual fulfillment, and honesty and openness. This actually only applies to monogamous relationships, though--in a poly relationship, I could get various needs met through different people, which would probably mean that sexual fulfillment would end up being less important in a primary relationship.

That said, some domestic support would be nice, but not nice enough to put up with someone telling me I should be neater. I'd rather live with a complete slob that even have the remotest risk that I will get tssked.

Also, I'm expecting to end up probably having to provide financial support for awhile, and that's fine with me. It was the model I was raised with, after all; my mom was the "breadwinner" during my formative years. I think I actually feel more comfortable with that. Hell, my life would be far simpler if D *didn't* want a job.

[justpat.livejournal.com]

I tried to mark sexual fulfillment five times for both genders, but clicking repeatedly on the box just toggled the check mark on and off.

[delchi.livejournal.com]

I just want to say thank you for " Unpartnered as a lifestyle choice ".

I think that best fits me, and I intend to use it when I try to describe myself to people.